I can’t see it, but I can feel it

Tuesday, July 09, 2013

I’ve finally built up some momentum and I’m starting to get results.

I’m still doing Kaia FIT, a women’s-only bootcamp-type program. We recently did a 6-week Brik, which is basically a more intensive session than the 5-week sessions we normally do. While I didn’t commit fully to the diet portion of the program, I made it to every workout (5 days a week) during Brik. I wake up at 4 am to be in Carlsbad by 5 am, and there is a huge difference between doing that 3 days a week and 5 days! I was one tired girl by the end of the week. But I felt so much better overall!

While I have lost about 21 pounds since the beginning of the year and a few inches overall, that’s not what I’m happiest about. It’s about what I’ve gained so far. I’m a little stronger from the bodyweight workouts and I’ve started lifting weights in my garage. And these have given me the biggest confidence boost.

At the end of an outdoor Kaia workout last week, I was feeling pretty drained by the end of it. While the others ran to the other end of the parking lot, I walked back. It was all I had in me, I thought. Then the instructor had one last surprise: everyone had to hold a plank with their feet up on a retaining wall. Everyone was in place by the time I got there. The one good thing about a fast-paced workout is that it limits the time I have to think, I can’t do this/My body doesn’t work that way/etc. Those thoughts have always been automatic for me. But they’re beginning to fade. I took a look at everyone’s feet to see how they placed them on the wall, and then I got myself into position. There was a whisper of, I can’t do this, but there was a louder voice that said, How do you know? And that is becoming more common these days.

I have been taking progress photos of myself so I can see how I change. But I swear I don’t see any difference yet! Maybe a little in my face, but only from one angle. I can’t see the changes that are happening, but I can feel them.

Back in April, WOLFKITTY, my husband and I hiked up this giant hill near where we live. This past weekend, we hiked to Double Peak again. At the top is a beautiful old tree, and you can enjoy a 360-degree view of northern San Diego County. The first hike was a leg killer. We hadn’t hiked in a while and some parts are pretty steep. It was challenging and I felt the effects for days afterward. This time, it was still challenging and I was sweating buckets, but I felt stronger on the way up. Some Kaia girls had reached the top long before we did, and they even ran past us on their way down while we were still hiking! That happens on every Kaia run, too. I’m always last! But that doesn’t bother me as much anymore.

Kaia has a few mantras and one is, Find your hard. And I do. I know that my version of hard is another girl's warm-up, and that’s OK. As I progress, it’ll be my warm-up one day, too.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post

    You are awesome!
    1737 days ago
    Awesome job, Heather! Every time I see your check in at Kaia, I think about how dedicated you are! Congrats on the 21 pounds down and so many NSV's! I want to try Double Peak sometime soon.
    1737 days ago
  • ABB698
    You are rocking it! So proud of you for your consistency and pushing yourself to 'find your hard'! You're awesome!!
    1739 days ago
    You are doing amazing girl!
    1742 days ago
    Wow. You are so committed and are working hard. Love it. 4am wake up? That is incredible. That shows a lot of inner strength that you have as well as developing your outer strength. And sticking with the program that sounds really challenging. Very impressive. Amazing!

    Great work. You're making progress and pushing forward. Keep up the great work! emoticon emoticon

    1745 days ago
    4AM... good lord. I don't know how you do it! I consider myself a morning person but dang. There's just no way!

    My CrossFit has started posting a "bonus" endurance WOD several days a week for people training for marathons and half marathons in the fall. I, of course, am not training for a half or full marathon, but I think I could really use the endurance training anyway. However, with a 90 minute commute, I really do not have a lot of time and the endurance WOD is supposed to be at least 3 hours separate from your CrossFit WOD. So most people do their endurance WOD in the morning and their CrossFit WOD at night or vice versa. I'm trying to figure out a way I can do it, but I'm coming up kind of short... on time...
    1745 days ago
    Congrats on your success so far. I did a boot camp and I was always the last never hurt my feelings eighter. Although I was the oldest.

    Keep up the good work and much success on your journey!

    emoticon ~Pat~ emoticon
    1745 days ago

    Comment edited on: 7/9/2013 2:46:12 PM
  • CANDIK48
    Good for you for sticking to it! Isn't it amazing to discover when we think we're tapped out, we reach deeper and find a little more to get us through? Pretty soon, you'll be running circles in the parking lot instead of walking.. I have faith! emoticon emoticon
    1745 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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