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Need vs Want. Words vs Action. I Will vs Actually Doing.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Hi Sparkers! Happy Mid-June already! I am back from my Williamsburg trip which I took last week. We didn't get to see everything because of the 9 inches of rain we got from the Tropical Storm! I still had a good time though - some pictures are below. We went searching for toads/frogs in the rain. =)

Lately I have been having a hard time with my journey. I don't have the urge to Spark as often as I used to. I still love this awesome community - but I have been focusing on other aspects of my life. I spend a lot of quality time with my boyfriend, my parents, and his parents. I have been working on my plant projects a lot lately too.

In my mind, I want to reach my goal weight. I keep telling myself I NEED to do it. Tuesday was my first cardio kickboxing class. It was AWESOME. It was the hardest workout I have ever done. Doing this class makes me now think that 5K races are as simple as walking 20 minutes at any pace I want! The class was basically everything that I want in a workout. I think I worked out every muscle in my body to the max! We jogged for 5 minutes before the class started. It was strange running on the mats with no shoes on, but it felt good! After the class, the instructor said my cardio was great & it will take me a few classes to pick up all of the moves. My arms and shoulders were really sore yesterday, and my legs got more sore as the day went on. Today I soaked in the tub for 10 minutes to try and help out. My muscles are sore in my legs that I don't think I ever felt before! The feeling is GOOD. It makes me Want to work out more. I have 9 more trial classes. If I want to do any more, I will have to pay between 10 and 15 dollars a class depending on which deal I choose. That is expensive. The BEST deal they have would have me paying $527 for 50 classes. $10.50 isn't too bad for a class, but I don't have an extra 500 laying around!

I have been trying to find a dress for my cousin's wedding - which isn't until September. I hate that I feel insulted every time I need to find clothes no matter what type. Size 12 gowns are too big, size 10 are too small or make me look awkward. I love the look of many gowns, but they don't look right when I try them on. Somehow I did find a dress that I do like. It is an XL Juniors dress with spaghetti straps. I really like it, but it makes the flub stick out around my armpits. The XL fit better everywhere except the chest area - it is loose. The L was tight everywhere else except the chest area haha. My Mom said we can get it altered & I can get a a jacket to wear with it.. but I don't know. Maybe I will find something else that won't make me feel so insecure. I hate how putting on clothes can really change my whole outlook about myself so fast. Everything I try on usually puts me in a negative mood instead of a happy one! Trying on clothes really shows me my flaws. Maybe if I keep working out at the kickboxing class, my arms will look better!

Most of my troubles are mental. I eat "bad" food because I choose to do it. No one is making me snack extra during the day. When I wake up the next day, I keep telling myself "I shouldn't eat too much today because I want to lose weight". Then I snack and then snack again later on. I SHOULD spend more time planning out meals, but then I am not home some nights. If I had my own place, I wouldn't be traveling between places as often. What I am Actually Doing is making excuses for why I am going off track with my goals. I want to reach my goals, but I Need to make the time to do this!

I want to do Cardio Kickboxing & Zumba once a week.
I need to stay focused and actually doing this!
I want to sign up for another 5K, but I need to do more training.
I need to start tracking my food again
I will try to stay positive as much as I can
I need to relax when I start to get stressed
I need to not be so hard on myself if I "slip up"
I will do what I say instead of just hoping I will do it.

Hopefully everyone has a great rest of the week - Keep Sparking! I am going to try and catch up on some SparkFriend blogs. Those always inspire me to keep pushing forward!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I think the summer months tend to slow everyone down. Just stick to your workouts and you'll be able to achieve your goals! Love the pics of you and your hunnie, you both look so very happy! emoticon
    1765 days ago
  • KONRAD695
    Bummer about the rain. Glad you used the same up-beat attitude with it as you do with everything else. Doesn't it feel good to have a flow in life that make even the bad stuff seem easy.

    Good luck on the dress stuff. I agree with everyone and getting the dress fitted.

    emoticon You're doing great!!
    1768 days ago
    Enjoyed your pictures I just want to say sign up for the 5K that will push you to train that's how I do it emoticon
    1769 days ago
    Beautiful pictures! Looks like a fun adventure! For the dress,I'd try a 12 and have it taylored. They do a great job and it doesn't cost too much. A custom fit!! :)
    1770 days ago
    You look great in that tank top with your boy friend. For the dress thing you your Mom is right you just need to find someone to alter what you get. Most just need a dart or seam taken in a bit. Also have you looked at a consignment shop as then you don't have to pay full price and the rest of the money can go to get it altered. Remember the problem is clothes are made to fit everyone and most people aren't or never will be the one size fits all. emoticon
    1770 days ago
    I would buy the 12 and get it tailored to fit. I do this often with my clothes.
    1770 days ago
  • DALID414
    emoticon eww! (Says the girly girl emoticon )
    1770 days ago
  • 123ELAINE456
    Great Blog. Glad that You enjoyed your vaction. Take one step at a time and You can start tracking your food and get back into the routine of things. You Can Do It. Just Push Forward. You are doing good. Great Pictures too. God Blessings to You and Everyone. Have a Marvelous Day. Take Care. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    1770 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/13/2013 7:34:57 PM
    Keep working and thanks for the great blog. Love your pictures and the second with the orange and yellow flowers is my fav. (flowers emoticon ) emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1770 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/13/2013 4:53:17 PM
    Sorry you were Rained Out still nice to get away - do not worry so much about the Community , sometimes we get busy in Real Life that requires attention . Happy to hear about the Kickboxing - you go girl ! I hope that Dress issues does not turn out to be like the Zumba Shoes - Just Kidding !!! You'll find a dress just like you'll reach your goal ! Looking Good Kim - Congrats on the Motivator Award - You Rock - Hugs K emoticon
    1770 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/13/2013 4:51:28 PM
  • LYNSEY723
    Great photos! I know you have the strength to get through this rough patch! Start out with just getting on Spark more and see if that helps your motivation! Loving the kickboxing class should help too!

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    1771 days ago
    Do you best to continue with your healthy lifestyle. I hope you find the perfect dresss!
    1771 days ago
    Great Blog! I seem to be struggling with the same things. I just need to put myself into the mentality that there is no reason that I cannot be doing something for myself at least once a day. Even if that's walking around the block for 10 minutes.

    Your kickboxing class sounds like a lot of fun. I might have to look into that. Though, like you, I don't have an extra 500 lying around somewhere. If you find it hiding somewhere, let me know emoticon

    Glad you had fun on your trip. Your pictures are really nice.
    1771 days ago
    1771 days ago
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