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Old Habits

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Sometimes you think you've got an old habit licked, only to have it sneak up on you & nip at your heels, or if you're really "lucky" take a chunk out of you.

Today I got nipped. Or rather, I slipped. When my food troubles started, I was probably about 10 or so. My mom never really taught me what eating healthy was, she just said, "no" . So I would get up in the middle of the night, sneak downstairs, and help myself to whatever sweet we had that I wanted. Amazingly, I only got caught once, but my mom failed to recognize it for what it was - a burgeoning problem with unhealthy eating. emoticon

This lead to a habit of "sneaking" food. I would hide away what I ate that wasn't a regular meal. A snack here, a candy bar there. As though if noone saw me eat it, it didn't count, the calories didn't count. This habit has continued into adulthood.

I thought after all this time on Spark, I had this habit licked. I made sure to eat in front of people, or if I didn't, I made sure it was simply because someone wasn't around. I wasn't hiding anymore, because I realized that even if someone in my life didn't see what I ate, my body still had gotten the calories. This was a big realization for me.

Today tho, it snuck up on me. I had some ice cream. When I went to put the bowls away, I decided I wanted another spoonful. Ok, fine. However, I caught myself hoping that no one would "catch" me having it. I hadn't thought like that that in a long time, and I redirected my thoughts as soon as I caught it. But I'm unhappy that it happened at all; I thought I was past that. emoticon Guess I have to still be more vigilant.
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    1774 days ago
  • KENWANNE2013
    It is tough when those old habits sneak up on us, but... there is a difference this time. this time you have experience of yourself being different to compare it with, which means you have stronger choices.

    Can you think of a reason why you have temporarily slipped back e.g. something like the past reminding you? Restimulating old patterns? If you can pinpoint the event or the trigger then next time it occurs you can choose another behaviour.

    When I had a similar experience, I identified what it was, and then created a new 'image' of my feeling the old feeling, but reacting to it differently. I gave myself 5 mins each day to visualise the old feeling coming up, and me reacting differently.
    1775 days ago
    This is a tough one - for some reason middle of the night snacking when it's not in front of any one equates to zero calories in my mind emoticon so just getting rid of that one habit is huge. WTG with saying no to yourself. emoticon
    1775 days ago
    That was great you caught yourself before it got worse. I am guilty of having done the same thing, and I still catch myself. Sometimes I think "No one will see me" even when I am alone, and I live alone. I think its because I have done it so long, that even living alone, I still have to hide it. Silly, I know. But you are doing great. We all fall, but get back up (hopefully). emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1776 days ago
    emoticon for blogging about this. There's no telling how many people you have just helped by telling your story. I have had this problem as well. Thankfully, it's mostly in my past. It's hard though because sometimes I still have a tendency to look around to see if anyone is watching when I eat something (even freggies). How crazy is that? Hard habit to break, for sure!!

    emoticon emoticon
    1776 days ago
    Confessing what you did is a step in the right direction. I have experienced a great deal of healing just by "outing" myself on many of my destructive behaviors. I am reminded of a verse that says confess your faults to each other and pray for each other so that you might be healed. I believe all things are possible, even changes in our thoughts and behaviors to develop a healthier lifestyle.

    Thanks for sharing your experience. emoticon
    1776 days ago
    Good job catching yourself and redirecting your thinking. That's not easy to do. I used to sneak food too. I'd buy whole meals at a drive through, and by the time I got home, I'd have it eaten and all evidence thrown away. It's not easy to overcome.

    1777 days ago
    I used to sneak food too, I take healthy meals at lunch so evberone thinks i eat well all the time. i openly admit that i eat jun other times of the day.
    Bad habits are a pain though because they are like addictions. Alwayys with us, but we beat them as long as we stay mindfull of it.
    1777 days ago
    It's an engrained habit that won't disappear by wishing it away.
    You did good . . . facing it and dealing with it.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

    We all have things the sneak up on us.
    You're right . . . we have to be vigilent.

    1777 days ago
    You caught it and corrected it. That's the important part.
    1777 days ago
    You'll get it my friend. Just emoticon and remember, you're human. If we keep doing our best at least 80% of the time, we're going to still succeed.

    I believe in you and I know you believe in you too, You are so worth it!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1777 days ago
  • PJ2222
    emoticon emoticon
    1777 days ago
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