I made a stand, but can I stand here?

Thursday, June 06, 2013

Okay, my friend called me today and suggested eating out. I ate out with him yesterday. We went to Denny's, a frequent stand-by. I had the turkey and avocado grilled sandwich. When I checked at home to see how many calories were in it, SHOCK! THERE ARE 800 CALORIES IN THE SANDWICH ALONE. Fortunately I was able to minimize the damage and stay within my calorie range, but it sure was an eye-opener.
So when he called and asked if I wanted to eat out, I said NO. This is my ex-husbnd. We are still friends. It's hard not to be when you have 3 children and 7 grandchildren in common. We even live in the same building. He has re-married, but his wife is in a nursing home. He is very faithful about visiting her, but her memory is going so he doesn't get much conversation from her. I feel sorry for him spending hours at the nursing home, then eating out by himself.
I also have a next-door neighbor who likes to eat out and often goes with us. She is disappointed when we don't go. She won't go with him without me, I'm not sure why, but she won't. I feel like I'm letting them down when I don't go out to eat.
But I need to say NO for my own sake. I cannot eat out and stay on my program and stay within my budget. The trouble is, we women of my generation were not raised to think of ourselves first. So I've made the first step. I've said NO. Now I need to keep saying NO to them and also to myself, because eating out is one of my favorite things.
NO! NO! NO! (just practicing)
So, you may have noticed I once again changed my profile pic. It is to more accurately reflect where I am now. So this is my beginning pic. I will change them back as I lose weight.
My first three days have gone well. I've been drinking water, increasing gradually my walking minutes, and staying within my plan. So I'm pretty proud of ME. I know if (no not if) AS I keep it up the pounds will begin to fall off again. I sure feel better thinner.
Keep on Sparking my friends, emoticon emoticon
Love, Janet
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Like Lynn, there are many better choices at Denny's and other restaurants. I find the sodium is even harder to control when eating out, especially when I enjoy a cup of soup. My best to you as you choose wisely to stay the course to eat healthy. Hug, hug -- Evelyn.
    2972 days ago
    I went out a couple of weeks ago to Denny's and as I started to order my brother took over and he ordered me everything I wanted but in diet form; did you know Denny's had a diet menu and that their breakfast omelets can be made with egg whites and veggies? Plus, they had turkey bacon .. I even asked for dry fried hashbrowns [meaning as little oil as possible] all the calories are on the SP tracker too.
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    Next time research your options on-line first... then you can eat out without feeling bad. emoticon emoticon
    2973 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/7/2013 2:39:23 AM
    Good for you, Janet! You have made some great rules and plans and yes, I think you can stand by them. And if you can't, I'm sure you can find something cheap and healthy to eat out. Well, maybe not:) How about cooking something for your friend and your 'ex' and then you don't have to feel badly about her feeling let down. Good Luck, I know that you can do whatever you put your mind to. So far it's lasted three days and it will last many more! Love you!

    2973 days ago
  • GRANDMA1951
    Good for you. It's hard to say No, especially since you feel guilty. But, you need to do it for YOU. I like the suggestion of eating in, although I'm not sure the other two people would agree. Good luck.
    2974 days ago
    Great work, Janet. Others have already give you suggestions on how to manage eating out or choosing where to go, etc., so I won't say anymore. Especially since it seems that you really don't want to go. An occasional meal out might be fine, but not all the time, right? You'll get it all figured out, I'm sure. Great progress (and I hear you on those sandwiches that turn into gut-busters...yikes!!) Love, Jeannie
    2974 days ago
    emoticon Sometimes it is so hard to say "no", but sometimes you need to in order to take care of yourself. Good job!
    2974 days ago
    Great at saying No!
    2974 days ago
    Researching restaurants and their menus in the area always helps me. I look at their nutrition menu and decide what I am going to get before I go. Do you have a Subway near you? They have some good options.
    2974 days ago
    It sounds like you made a major decision last night - it is hard to say NO especially when it is for such a SELFING reason like taking care of YOURSELF. I had stayed close with my ex husband and am now friends with his widow on FB. His death in January was VERY hard for me.

    There are a number of ways to minimize the damage - why not offer to have both him and your other friend come to your house and fix a HEALTHY meal - agree that what you all will do is pitch in together to prepare the meal and use the savings for a really nice restaurant once in a while? Or alternate whose home to eat at or take a picnic and meet someplace where you can enjoy the company without the temptations of too much of too many foods you are trying to avoid.
    2974 days ago
    When we go out to eat, I seem to be the most boring (but healthiest) eater at the table. I find it helpful to research a restaurants menu before going - if possible - so you know what you're getting into. It takes lots of thought and for planning.
    2974 days ago
    I am so with you, it is so depressing when even the "healthier" options still put us at like 1200 calories for the meal. It's so not fair lol.

    That is so great that you are still friends with your exhusband, and it is hard when the social hour is revolving around food. Is there anyway you can spend time with him doing different stuff, like going for a walk? Or you can invite him over to eat what healthier dinner you have planned? I don't want you to miss out on life and company of others, but I am proud of you for saying no to the eating out. emoticon
    2974 days ago
    I LOVE to eat out, but once I see the menu and smell the food, I eat way too much and somehow things always have more calories than if I make at home. GOOD FOR YOU that you recognized the need to say NO and THEN DID IT!! emoticon
    2974 days ago
    Good for you! Good for recognizing the problem and then doing something about it! Maybe deciding to eat in with friends can be an option to consider. Then you eat what you want and get to socialize with or support your friends! Maybe it could become a rotation amongst you all! Just a suggestion! It is nice to hear that you are considerate of your affect on them and hopefully they know it as well!

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    2974 days ago
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