Maybe this Week!!!
Monday, May 27, 2013
Today I weighed myself: 201!! I'm breathing down the neck of 199!! I really want to get myself this bedspread that I've picked out as a reward.....but the bedspread and a pillow sham come to about $75....and next month's budget is very tight and the month hasn't even started!! I don't know that there is going to be any way for me to get that as a reward. I think I'm going to start praying about this, that if God wants me to have that bedspread that he will make a way....and if he wants me to be content with a book or a pair of earrings....then to do that instead and to help me to be happy about it.
Today my husband was looking at me as I stood in the kitchen and he said, "You've lost weight!" Nothing tastes as good as hearing that feels!
Today is my daughter's 21st birthday. I think back to that day....14 hours of hard labor and 3 hours of pushing. I was bruised and swollen afterward....but so so happy. I was thinner and prettier in those days....and I was ignorant of the hardships and suffering that lay down the road. It's been a long hard 21 years and at the same time that seems like yesterday. I would do some things so differently...some things I would pay more attention to and enjoy more thoroughly. I would treasure many of the moments more than I did. I would enjoy the freedoms more. But I could never love my daughter more or be more grateful for her than I am.
Sorry for that burst of nostalgia. I looked through the photo album today that I made for my daughter of the first four years of her life. I looked at the pictures of my parents twenty years ago.....when they were the age I am now. They looked so young and strong and now seem so frail and old....and I think "In the next 21 years....I will be in my 70's.....and looking like my parents. My parents will likely be gone by then....My husband? Will he be here? After his diagnosis of heart disease...it is hard to know. Change is coming. Maybe more change than has already occurred. My daughter will be 42. The thought of all of that fills me with some dread.....but not really fear. My Lord will get me through it one day; one step at a time. Hopefully I will be healthy at 70 ....Hopefully the eating choices I'm making these days will pay off in those days. They certainly can't hurt.