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Be Yourself

Thursday, May 09, 2013

I love Will Smith and I LOVE this quote... I can't tell you how many times in the past I would 'chase' people I wanted in my life. I guess with experience and maturity, I have come to live by this in that I believe if someone is meant to be a part of my life, it will be.

This also speaks to being yourself, authentically. I used to try to 'change' things in myself for people to please them, but now I say - love me as I am or move on.

It's not always easy, but a necessary thing for me to do in order to live a peaceful life.

Today is the day we meet with the child psychiatrist as a family and I am a bit apprehensive. With all that has been going on with my kids and all the appointments and meetings I have attended - it makes me feel like I'm doing a bad job since my kids seem so unhappy. It's really hard to swallow. But thankfully at my counselling session last night I was able to voice this and make a plan for what to say in today's meeting ... because I know in my heart I am doing the best that I can.

I am on day 11 AF today and beating my longest streak this year (and probably in a long while) of 10 days. I have no plans on breaking the streak anytime soon.

Being AF has allowed me to be strong and clear through the difficult challenges presenting themselves with me on a daily basis with my daughters as it's been like a roller coaster ride of emotions (ups but mostly downs).

I believe that things will get better as we work through this. And again, I am grateful for the other great things in my life including my work and my new friend who has given me much to smile about and oddly enough - I didn't chase him and truly playing it 'cool' and the results so far have been unlike anything I have experienced in this whole relationship thing (if I can even call it that ... I guess that's why it's different - I'm not jumping the gun and going all 'gaga' on him but enjoying each moment and liking him more and more every time I see him)...

I am seeking full balance again and working through these family issues. I know in time... this too shall pass.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I love Will too, he's such a genuine guy!
    You're a great mum Helene, your daughters are lucky to have you, things will improve emoticon
    2351 days ago
    you are a great mom and I love the will smith quote also . things will get better with time.
    2352 days ago
    Love the quote and Will Smith! Wishing all the best in counseling. We all go through it with our kids. It will be better soon. You just have to believe this. God bless.... emoticon
    2352 days ago
    emoticon on your AF streak.

    Good luck with the family session today. Just remember that you are NOT at fault.
    You have always been there for your girls. Your a wonderful parent, who has done the best she could. Something good will come from this meeting.

    2352 days ago
    HUGS to you. Raising a teen is difficult, difficult, difficult and it is, it seems, their job to make us feel like we are failures. But we're NOT!

    My DS will be 21 soon. Let's just sum up his teen years with one word . . . HELL. But we did all we could do with the counseling, psychologists, psychiatrists, behavioral therapists. Nothing seemed to work. NOW that he is away from home (in the army, stationed in Fairbanks, AK), we have phone conversations and I am absolutely stunned at the things sounding like ME that come out of his mouth! All that means is these kids put on the persona of disliking us, but they really are soaking everything in.

    You're doing it the best you can. That's something that you have to always remember.

    Wishing you luck with the family counseling session. It is nerve wracking, but you'll get something good from it, I'm sure.

    HUGS Keep up what you're doing.
    2352 days ago
  • AME4IT
    emoticon job on your AF streak.

    Parenting is the hardest job in the world - there is no manual on how to do it 'right' and every child is vastly different from one another. You ARE doing the best you can do and that's all you can do. Your girls will look back at this rocky time and realize that you are their rock.
    2352 days ago
    YAY for the AF streak! And yay for feeling giddy about boys. This weekend may be a challenge for AF, but we can do it!
    2352 days ago
    Your counselor is right-
    take a deep breath-
    stand up tall and
    KNOW in every fiber of your being
    that none of is perfect but you are,
    and always have been,
    doing the very best you can at any given time.
    2352 days ago
    Great quote. Need to remember that one. I think we all go through these times with our children. It, too, shall pass.
    2352 days ago
    So glad that the meeting has come up, Good for you all I am sure. Nerve wracking yes but having had councelling alone and with hubby it is nice to know someone is there to help say things and interpet with you.
    AF!!!! well I am so so proud of you, and love seeing you feel so positive about it.
    The guy that too is great...... I do see a difference in how you post and how you are not as you say chasing or going after " and as in a long term relationship it is all the small things and the every day nuances that are important too. Sounds as if this way you are doing all the right things to make it work and not just be a romantic meeting but a friend and more which is awesome.
    I am so glad that you are doing better and hopefully all will only continue to improve with help!!!
    HUGS for the meeting!!
    2352 days ago
    You may not always feel like a good mother, but you are because you are doing the hard work needed with your girls to help them get to a better place, while doing the same thing to help their mother get to be healthy and whole as well. That makes you a super success story in my book. I've shared with you that I've had to do some of these same things with my daughters. They are in their 20's now, but we are all super close and we feel that while we struggled for a while, they know how much I love and am committed to my relationship with them. That has stayed with them much more than the times of pain, which they made peace with long ago. Love triumphs. So please stay strong and AF, you are doing an amazing job!
    2352 days ago
    You are a wonderful mother. You can't blame yourself for everything.

    And what a wonderful outlook you have!!!






    2352 days ago
    It is always better to get those feelings out in the open.
    Each of you need to express what is on your mind
    so that those problems can be resolved.
    Good luck with the new friend. HUGS!
    2352 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/9/2013 9:40:34 AM
    I keep you in my heart, thoughts and prayers. GOD WILL take care of you and yours.

    2352 days ago
  • CARE4ME2
    You are doing what you need to, to reach your goals. emoticon
    2352 days ago
    You're on a roll!! Keep it going! So proud of your progress!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2352 days ago
    2352 days ago
    Awesome! So happy for you.... You can do it! Taking this quote with me today. Thank you!
    2352 days ago
    Being AF allows you to see clearly whatever you may face. Keep up the good work!
    2352 days ago
  • KIPPER15
    emoticon Love this quote. Really like Will Smith too!
    2352 days ago
    You're doing great!
    2352 days ago
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