going after what i want
Sunday, May 05, 2013
I don't want to be fat anymore. I live my whole life that way. I have had a good life, even when things were kind of ugly, my life has been a good one. I have always loved myself though I have always known I could be a lot better. I have had made huge strides in my faith and just in general, being a nicer more loving and accepting person. As my Spark anniversary is just two weeks away and though I planned to be so much further, I am happy with what I have accomplished. I want to be fit and healthy. I want to be long and lean (I got the long part down). I want to feel GORG whether I am in sweatpants or a bodysuit. I don't want to have to pose for every single picture I take because I will be confident with what results the camera shows me. I am so close to getting there.
These past few months, I was subconsciously throwing it away. I went from losing every week, to losing a couple pounds a month, to losing nothing for months, to gaining 5 pounds in two weeks. If that isn't a sign that I was on my way back to "Before" then I don't know what is. But THIS time, unlike the hundreds of other times I have lost weight, I caught myself and turned it around.
This past week, I worked out 5 days and put in 415 fitness minutes. That is nearly an hour and a half each workout. And they were intense workouts. Yesterday alone, I did 30 minutes of weights (shoulder, backs and glutes) and then did 30 min run/walk intervals and THEN went straight to Zumba. Today I am taking my gym bag to work with me and working out after I serve (which is a workout in itself, running back and forth thru a restaurant). Tomorrow, I have Zumba. Tues, Wed, and Thurs I will be training my running group. Friday I will do a light workout and Saturday I have a 5k (the Color Run). I will shoot for 450 fitness minutes this week. I have already gotten rid of 3 of those extra pounds!
Before I go, I have a HUGE NSV for me. My mom gave me a ton of clothes to sale at my garage sale but weather forced me to cancel it. One of the things in her pile was an olive colored, military style blazer that still had the tags on it. It looked pretty tiny; it was a misses 14. Well I am in a 16 so I was just going to sell it. But something told me to try it on. It fit like a glove! But the bigger NSV came when I wore the jacket to my mom's house. She kept saying, "That is the jacket I gave you to sell. It looks so good, I think I want it back." So we were going back and forth. My brother and my cousin were there and my brother finally interjected. "Mom, you wouldn't even be able to wear that- Nikki is smaller than you. " You could have knocked my mom over with a feather. I have NEVER been smaller than my mother since I was 10 years old. We actually wore the same size when I was 10 and after that, I have always been larger than her. When she tried to deny it, my brother started to prod her to try it on. She refused and told me to keep it!
Well I have to get to work. Have a fantastic day Sparklers!