todays appointment with my counsellor
Tuesday, April 09, 2013
I had an appointment with my counsellor today. It was very emotional. I am a bit embarrassed cause I broke down crying uncontrollably. Even though I was so emotional it felt good to let it all out I have been holding on to it far to long. I told my counsellor that I feel unwanted. Do you know what it feels like to feel unwanted I mean really unwanted. It's not a very nice feeling let me tell you. As bad as it feels I was finally able to put into words what it is that I feel. I realize that I have felt unwanted all my life. That is why I feel like I don't fit in anywhere. I also feel abandoned, ashamed, rejected, like a failure etc. Even though I feel like crap in way I feel good cause I finally know what that dark feeling is deep deep deep deep deep deep down inside. Today I made a small break through and I can honestly say that I am proud of that.