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Battling temptation.

Monday, April 08, 2013

Thanks for all the replies on my last blog about struggling. I've continued to struggle since but things are getting better. TOM is finally over and the fatigue is lifting, and I am back in control of my eating. I am not caving to my cravings. I am not giving into the temptations anymore...I am not losing this war even if the battles temporarily make me lose some ground. I will not go whimpering back to 328 pounds. I will not. I WILL NOT!!!

I am not kidding when I tell you it is a war I am fighting. I'm sure all of you understand and relate. But let me tell you about the latest battle: See, my uncle always is getting extra junk food and brings it to our house. My father cannot say no to free stuff and so he takes it, even though no one else in the house wants it around because of the temptation. I am not even kidding when I say he has a fridge in the basement packed with chocolate covered cherries, Oreo cookies, etc. He also has those party barrels of cheese curls. I love cookies. I love cheese curls. And they are in the house, in excess. It's absurd!!!

During the battle I was wounded. I ate those things and was gluttonous. I felt so much shame. I was letting myself down. I was letting all of you down. So I started to fight back. I cleared out the kitchen of the junk and if it is brought up from the basement by someone else and left on the counter I am taking it right back downstairs. Out of sight and out of mind. I don't care if it is annoying to others.

Tomorrow will be a 100% on track day. I've already staked it with an Amy flag and declared victory!!!

Thanks for reading and backing me up. Your support really does mean so much to me and helps me keep going. Hope all of you have been well!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    emoticon emoticon
    2161 days ago
    You may have done this already, but I'll mention it anyways: ask your uncle to keep that stuff away from the house. If no one really wants it then why accept it? Remind your father that while it is free because it doesn't cost money, but it is expensive in what it does to your bodies.

    You could also consider donating it. You could probably donate some to a nursing home, assisted living facility, or a homeless shelter nearby. Make sure it's unopened. Could you imagine the treat those would be for a homeless person? Not only would you get it out of your house but you could help others who often feel forgotten and ignored to smile at a rare treat. Bonus: you would feel good for brightening someone else's day.
    2168 days ago
  • MTGIRL2012
    Its good to fight temptation and I am going through what you have been going through too. But remember it is not good to deprive yourself either. You need to have a balance between splurge and restrictions because otherwise you will crave it more often. I know right now my body is craving chocolate like never before, so I am eating chocolate. I know in a few days it will be over and I can return to my normal habits!!! Cheers!
    2169 days ago
    Amys unite. You can do this!
    2169 days ago
    Keep Sparkin'!!
    2169 days ago
  • SHOES17
    Remember to rake baby steps. Be kind to yourself. I live with my husband who is 115 pounds soaking wet. He has yummy food. However, right now is finishing off one of fat free yogurts! Go figure. Cookies are a tough one. I havent really found a substitute emoticon
    2169 days ago
    Girl, I know what you mean. Getting over the binging has been super hard for me, and temptation has been everywhere. My mom gives me an Easter basket full of crap I CANNOT EAT. What happened? I binged on it. And what pissed me off the most, is that there ARE certain candies I will eat, but instead, she gives me this Skinny Cow crap.

    You also know I deal w/ ridiculous temptation at work on a daily basis. I even told the mom I'm seeing a therapist to deal w/ my binging. (Yes, I admitted to my employer about my binging), and I'm not even kidding, today she sat their BUCKET of Easter candy out of the counter. It's kind of weird... she wants the kids to eat healthily. She doesn't let them eat tons of junk. She knows that I don't let them eat junk. But then when they get Halloween/Christmas/Easter candy, it literally just sits around. But anyway, as soon as I saw it, I had to hide it on top of the fridge. It was mind raping me all day. Ugh. But I was strong.

    You hit a rough patch, it's okay. Just keep going. Keep putting the temptation back in the basement. Why torture yourself? And if you ever are on the edge, PLEASE text me!!! :)
    2169 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon I am fighting along side you emoticon emoticon
    2169 days ago
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