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Why am I doing this?

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

Today in Spark Coach I was asked to ponder the question of WHY I want to lose this weight.

I have been on this weight loss journey for a long time and of course the standard answer to Why is to 'GET HEALTHY'.

YES, I want to do that too.


Having been fortunate enough to drop weight, inches and a ton of negativity in general, I have to readdress this question.

My health has improved greatly.

My insulin levels (being a type 1 diabetic) have dropped drastically. Over 70+% less insulin that I am taking today as compared with 2 years ago.

My Eye Pressures have dropped significantly, and although I will always be on drops for my Glaucoma, I no longer have to worry of damage being done. My pressures dropped from in the 30's to in the mid-teens.

I can walk. I can run. I can dance and jump.
I can do all of this with NO PAIN.

My attitude has had a serious adjustment.
Although I think of myself as always a happy person, that was not always true.
It was a mask I would wear for public eyes.
Well I can truly say that I no longer wear a mask.
I am truly a happy person.
I am also no longer afraid to show what emotions I do feel, whatever they may be.
This is because I feel I am no longer judged by my weight, but by who I am and what I do.

If I was still in the mindset of having kids, I believe my fertility troubles would also have dropped by the wayside by now. There was no known reason or cause, just the weight.

But if I did want and have them, I would finally have the energy to PLAY.
Of course looking at my son (almost 18), I missed out on a lot of Play time by having the weight issue.
Thankfully he is one of my biggest supporters and the shining star in my life.

I wanted the energy, stamina, etc to have a wonderful relationship with my DH.
I know TMI. LOL!

So why now? Why do I continue to do this? Continue to want to lose weight?

Well, I am not at my goal weight yet. I am still a work in progress.

If my health has improved this much, how much more will it go?

I am curious.

Yes that is an answer. I am curious to see how healthy I can be. How fit my body can become.

I have never been where I am now, so I want to see and be what I can become.

If I stay at this weight, I would be happy.

But why not try for more.

Is that greedy?
I don't think so. I think you should strive to be the best you can be in all ways.

My healthcare team wants me to try for more. Probably based on that ambiguous BMI.

Therefore I am striving to reach my goals
- Goal Weight
- Optimum Health
- Smaller size
- Stronger body
- Positive Attitude

I am sure there are more reasons why. Probably more important ones too, but I haven't thought of them yet. LOL!
I will think of them after I post. Isn't that the way?

I guess I like the attention I am getting too. Not that I encourage it, at least I hope I don't.
But never having been the person to turn people's heads, it is so flattering and such an ego boost to be able to do so.

I hope this doesn't make me a bad person. I don't think so, just an honest one.

So that sums up why for me.

What about you? Why are you doing this?

Hugs & Love,


And Now

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    A bad person? Oh, beautiful Angela, it all makes you a vibrant, appealing, vital force in the world. By having made yourself, your health and your life (romantic and other) better, you've made the people around you better. There is more waiting to be taken in your grasp, so continue to pursue your goals, the old, the new and the future ones. The goodness that you send out is life-affirming. You are a gift. In everything you do, you make gifts. Never doubt it.

    1834 days ago
    Oh, I SO understand the being curious part! Aren't you just curious to see what will happen, how you'll feel, what you'll be able to do? And won't it be fun to find out? You look amazing and totally deserve to turn heads, whether or not you're even trying. Spark on, sister!
    1837 days ago
    emoticon response! You are doing great and I like that you are honest about it all. I too want to see how fit and healthy I can get. Keep up the great work! emoticon emoticon
    1838 days ago
    Great blog....I applaud are a beautiful woman inside and out! Proud to call you my friend. Hugs
    1839 days ago
  • ERIN1957
    Great answers, just great!
    You are doing it!!
    1839 days ago
    Good response! It's interesting for me to consider, being at my goal weight. I keep thinking I need to do more, but I think that is because I've waged this "war" for so long, I really don't know what it is to be at "peace"!

    But it has been worth the effort for me, and I can tell it has been for you.

    Thank you for the thoughtful blog!
    1839 days ago
    Love that happy smile. emoticon
    1840 days ago
  • -LINDA_S
    You look not only thinner but so much younger! I wish you success in accomplishing all your goals!
    1840 days ago
    1840 days ago
    What a motivator!
    1841 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon You look FAB~ulous, gf! Love your success and how determined you are to make your goals reality. So very proud of you! *hugs*

    As for why I'm doing it: It is for improved health. I miss being able to do all the things I used to do. I'm doing it for my Babes~ those precious apples of my eye. I'm doing it so I can have more energy and feel better. Sure, it'll be great to get in smaller, stylish clothes, but getting rid of excess weight is all different from when I was young. Now it's about health versus sex appeal. *LOL* Thanks for sharing~ *hugs* BB~ emoticon
    1841 days ago
  • BOVEY63
    You should be so proud of all that you have accomplished; and the attention you are getting is very much well-deserved.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    You have set some great goals and I know you will reach them!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1841 days ago
  • MARTY728
    Simply SUPER! emoticon
    1841 days ago
    I started because I wanted to be able to play kickball with my fourth-graders. Now, I'm not teaching and they will be ninth-graders in September but I still want to be able to play kickball with fourth-graders. Stupid, huh?
    1841 days ago
    What an awesome journey you've been on! I think we're all a work in progress - from the day we're born until the day we die - evolving, changing, improving. That's life, right? Wanting to be the healthiest version of you is not greedy, it's intelligent! Also, being recognized for an amazing accomplishment and enjoying that recognition is not bad, it's human nature. You deserve the attention - you accomplished something that is inspiring to so many of us!

    Why am I doing this? I want to be the best possible version of me I can be - primarily for me but also for my loved ones and those around me. We can do this!
    1841 days ago
  • L*I*T*A*
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1841 days ago
  • -POOKIE-
    You have done great, to improve your medical health is an amazing outcome and you should be proud... all your reasons are wonderful!
    1841 days ago

    Love this blog!
    1841 days ago
    Great reasons from a great person....Go girl go...hugs.
    1842 days ago
    Great reasons! You have come so far! It's good that you are satisfied where you are but want to see how healthy you can get. You are right....we should strive to be the best we can be!

    And you look fabulous!

    1842 days ago
    you know why you are doing this...the pics tell the tale......go are an achiever
    1842 days ago
    I love everything about this blog! And I agree with you about the curiosity!! How healthy can we get? How incredibly fit are we capable of being! Did you ever see the video of the beautiful black woman who was 74 years old (I think), and started working out with her sister when she was 51?? I'll have to see if I can find it again - such an inspiration that we can be AMAZING at any age, and you certainly are a wonderful example of that!

    Keep on doin' it girlfriend! emoticon emoticon
    1842 days ago
    Great blog and you are soooooo hot now mama!
    1842 days ago
    1842 days ago
  • PCOH051610
    I showed my husband your before picture and after pictures (he agreed that at any size you are still a beautiful looking woman) and he was shocked. I don't know if I've ever told you how inspiring you are to me.
    1842 days ago
  • ANGIE121
    ecouraging thank the way u look gorgoeous emoticon emoticon
    1842 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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