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Loving Yourself: Loving Truths from a Friend

Tuesday, April 02, 2013

Have you noticed that it's so refreshing to find out we're not alone in all of our imperfections? Now don't get me wrong - I don't mean that in a bad way. It helps us to stop and take a deep breath, and to give ourselves permission to be a friend to ourselves and to say, "You're not alone. I understand." I was getting ready to write and post my Loving Yourself blog today, when I saw a note from my dear Spark Friend, STEELKICKIN. This prompted me to drop on in to say Hi. I noticed there was a blog written yesterday, and so I clicked on it and started to read:

"If you were able to peel back the layers of your life, disrobing the learned behaviors and shaped beliefs that you have carried with you throughout your life, would you do it? Who are you behind closed doors, when no one is speaking, when no one is listening, when no one is watching? What is your innermost dialogue that seems to be speaking with every heart beat, your true definition, your real purpose, of your life here on this earth? "

It was like I'd been exposed - down to my very being. The tears welled up in my eyes, as her words touched my very being.

"If you could cast off the garbage that your heart has carried over the last few years, would it be liberating, freeing? Most of the time, you do not like what you see when you look in your soul's mirror. Flawed. Imperfect. Handicapped. Broken. But it is in the mess of you that you will find your truth. You know this to be true. So why do you hesitate? You know it is within this kaleidoscope of pain, triumphs, successes and failures that your true definition lies."

Oh my gosh, she hit the nail right on the head! These words echoed what I know to be true to my very core. It takes great courage and perseverance to look in that mirror and be confronted with what we don't like about ourselves. Whether it's the mirror on the wall, or the mirror of our soul, the instinct is to turn away, and to ignore the tsunami of emotions that come flooding over us out of the blue, when just a moment ago all seemed so fine - so calm. It is necessary that we summon forth, right in that very moment, everything we have within us. It is here that we can learn the most about what we are made of. There is a "present" in that very moment if we allow ourselves to look closely at it, and to be open to our thoughts and emotions of it all. This was indeed one of these moments.

It is our very being that is pushing us forward, but only from the place of love, much like our mother's guiding hand as we took those very first steps. Guiding us towards the truth, and finding it within us so that we can then experience it.

"Her hands held me gently from the day I took my first breath.
Her hands helped to guide me as I took my first step.
Her hands held me close when the tears would start to fall.
Her hands were quick to show me that she would take care of it all."

It is about the balance of the yin and yang - the negative and the positive in ourselves and our lives - the states of love within us and around us. They will always be there - for that is what life is - the sum of the negative and the positive experiences of our everyday lives. Every experience contains all of the aspects of love - even the negative ones.

When you stop to think about it, all that we feel and experience is affected by one thing and one thing only - our emotions, or how we feel about it. We can use the techniques we are learning to guide ourselves toward the positive, and to see it. In the end, it is all about just love and loving.

Today I once again challenge you, as I am challenging myself, to bravely stand in front of that mirror - be it the physical one or the emotional one - and allow all to fall to the floor, and echoing Michelle's words, "Expose the true you, and embrace yourself with the same encouragement and compassion you claim to have for others".

I urge you to go and stop in to say Hi to Michelle, and to read her powerful blog in all its entirety. You can find it here:

Thank you, Michelle for being my North Star, and guiding me with your shining light . . . and allowing me to remember and feel love today.

Thanks for stopping by!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • ROSES17
    Enjoyed reading your blog. You have hit the nail on the head on so many areas.
    1836 days ago
  • ROSES17
    Enjoyed reading your blog. You have hit the nail on the head in so many areas.
    1836 days ago
    Such a powerful blog. Interesting part about a mother's care. Part of what I would have to strip away are the feelings that my mother didn't really feel that attachment.
    1838 days ago
    Really great Sharon. Makes one think for sure! Thanks for sharing it with us. I will check out Michelle's blog too!

    Hope you have a fantastic weekend!

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    1840 days ago
    Keep those postive thoughts coming, we all need them. Even those of us that have hardened outer shells. As Michelle wrote, peel back those layers. We all have many layers and would be surprised at what we would find.(both good and bad) Just be careful though when peeling those layers back. The truth can sometimes be hard to take. That is where acceptance needs to come in and help us through exposure.

    So no matter what one finds or how big your giants are to slay, be accepting of one's faults and Keep the Faith
    1842 days ago
    Very powerful indeed. I remember that when my marriage ended after 25 years I was left with just a shell of the person I had once been. It has taken many years and some very special people to help me find the person I knew I was. I have replaced the sadness with quiet joys, the low self esteem with pride that I can be the strong one in so many ways for my friends. I have taken the that beaten down fragment of a person and become a Real Live Woman. Positivity from Spark People and many of my friends here has helped me find that woman! emoticon
    1842 days ago
    What a powerful blog. Thank you for sharing and for all the insight from steelkickin's blog.

    1842 days ago
  • RPCLEM2000
    Looking inward to your self is very helpful. Lately I have very of my accomplishments and have made several changes outside of my physical changes and find I am much happier with myself than usual. I need to keep this process to make sure I don't feel inadequate.

    Thanks for the reminder
    1842 days ago
    Thank you so much! It never hurts to take a close look at ourselves. I know I have some bad flaws but I am willing to work on them a step at a time to become the best that I can be. When I meditate I like to say the Our Father and I never get past the Our part because it boggles my mind that everyone here on earth is my brother and sister. Every single person. Anyway! Good blog!
    1842 days ago
    That is so beautiful and inspiring. I'm going to go read her complete blog and then "go to the mirror". Thank you so much for sharing!
    1842 days ago
    Isn't it great when the emoticon goes off in our minds! Gotta love those epiphanies.
    1842 days ago
    I love your blog and your desire to be so positive and focus on loving yourself. It's wonderful. I would love to join you in this quest and find my negative self talk habits so ingrained that it's hard to do. I hope to be inspired by you!!
    1842 days ago
  • SAMI199
    You are so right-we are not alone & your blog series have been a gift-the wisdom & inspiration you share have made such a difference.Thank you for your dedication to helping us all in our journey to peeling back the layers, learning to love ourselves & be happy in the moment. I will check out Michelle's blog.Thanks for sharing.

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    1843 days ago

    Comment edited on: 4/3/2013 10:45:18 AM
    Thank you Sharon. I really enjoyed those
    inspiring words. I need to work on it. I also
    checked Michelle's blog. You two ladies are
    so inspiring. Thank you for making me look
    at 'me' and like who I am. emoticon
    1843 days ago
  • 123ELAINE456
    Awesome Blog. Enjoyed it Very Much. Thanks for Sharing It With Us. God Blessings to Everyone. Have a Great Day. Take Care. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!
    1843 days ago
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    1843 days ago
    We pick up so many things along life's journey...we just need to learn which of them to hold on to and carry on...and which to leave by the roadside. Keep up the good work! Thanks for the encouragement! Spark on! emoticon emoticon
    1843 days ago
    Great blog!
    1843 days ago
    Oh my. Learning to love ourselves as we love others really IS about peeling away all those layers. . . exposing our very core. Vulnerability. BUT rest assured, when we do this, we will find that spirit in ourselves to love. To nurture.

    What a powerful blog!

    HUGS (and giving myself one too!)
    1843 days ago
  • L*I*T*A*
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    1843 days ago
    Oh, does my heart good to know that in some way, somehow, there are those who can take comfort in our words. And, yes, isn't it nice to know that we are not alone in our thoughts and feelings? It's true, we are never alone because deep in our core, in our very fibers of being, we all share these insecurities, these questions that burn within every day. To know that it is normal, to know that we are not abnormal in these thoughts, is such comfort.

    If we could take someone who is struggling with doubts and discomfort into our arms, would we not? Of course we would. We would do everything in our power to build them up, to nurture them, to build their spirit with loving why wouldn't we do that with ourselves?? We have to learn to love ourselves, our earthly imperfections. We are so beautiful as is. My challenge to all is to lovingly care for yourself as you would your closest and loved friend and family member. God made us all beautiful and perfect in His eyes...He made us just as He wanted us!! As my friend JADOMB noted, "Who are we to argue with God?"

    I love you, my dear sweet friend. God bless you for what you are doing here and for spreading your light to all of us.
    1843 days ago
    I really enjoyed your post!
    1843 days ago
  • AUNTB63
    Looking at my emotional self is hard to do, but I will do my best to peel away a few layers and be truthful. I will also accept what I see and forgive myself if I need to and praise myself when I can. Thanks for sharing this blog. emoticon
    1843 days ago
    emoticon again for your words of inspiration and for sharing Michelle's thoughts as well. emoticon

    1843 days ago

    Comment edited on: 4/2/2013 4:34:43 PM
  • VICKI-B-
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    1843 days ago
  • JACKIE542
    emoticon Great blog.
    1843 days ago
    Another awesome blog. Thank you & thanks for sharing Michelle's with us as well. Bright blessings to you my friend. emoticon
    1843 days ago
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  • PHOENIX1949
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    1843 days ago
    I really love this series, and todays challenge is so wonderful.
    If we aren't taking care of the emotional self with all the physical and mental work of changing habits and looking different then the emotional stuff left behind, unexamined will be a hurdle that will be necessary to prevent the unwinding of all the great work we have been doing.
    1843 days ago
  • ROSES17
    Great blog!!!
    1843 days ago
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