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Dates and Moving On

Monday, March 18, 2013

Let me preface this by saying that this blog had nothing to do with nutrition (minus one sentence somewhere within all the details).

So, I'm feeling better about everything after this last weekend. I went on a date on Saturday and it went REALLY well. I know that people might think that I might be trying to move on too quickly, but its really helped me to just get back into my normal routine and move past "The (ex) Boy".

My friend Meaghan and I had been planning this brewery tour at New Belgium Brewery in Fort Collins (Colorado) for over a month and had gotten a group together to go (The (ex) Boy was going to come with me but since he ended things with me on the 4th that wasn't going to happen anymore). I had reactivated my POF profile that hadn't been active in over 2 years, kinda updated it and then just left it alone. I wasn't planning on really looking for anyone or searching on their until I was ready to, but figured it couldn't hurt to at least have it up to kind of help me to start getting used to the idea of moving on. Well, last Sunday, I got a message from this guy (We'll just call him FC for now) and it was a really great, well thought out message. (I had gotten several other messages that were pretty lame (aka they said a variety of "hey" or "you're hot") yeah....sorry guys I'm not going to respond to something that doesn't warrant one). I decided to write him back on a whim (after Meaghan kind of encouraged me to just go ahead and that it couldn't hurt anything) and we started messaging a little back and forth. After a few messages we exchanged numbers and we talked on the phone every night last week for at least 2 hours....our longest conversation was over 4 hours lol. After talking to him for a few days I decided that since he lives in Fort Collins and I was going to be up there on Saturday with a group of friends that it wouldn't be a horrible idea to invite him to come with us on the tour. It was a much more comfortable idea for me to be with a group of my friends when I met him so that if it didn't turn out so well I wasn't just alone on an awkward date with him. Also, I wanted to get Meaghan's opinion on him (she's "my person"). So Friday night, FC sends me a text telling me that he can't wait to see me Saturday and then we texted off and on Saturday morning. We had decided to meet at the Brewery a little early so that we could meet and get that awkward first meeting kind of out of the way before all of my and Meaghan's friends got there. We got along right away and just had a good conversation while we waited for everyone. Meaghan ended up being late and so instead of going on the 2:00 tour we went on the 3:00 one. FC was really great at engaging with our friends and just having conversations so that was great. After a while he started putting his hand on my back when we were standing and listening to the tour guide (he started by just standing closer and kind of leaning in next to me lol) He was opening doors, taking my glasses from the samples after I finished, etc etc the entire time.

After the tour finished we all decided to go and grab some food (we all had had quite a few samples and needed some food in our stomachs lol) So because FC is from Fort Collins we kind of delegated him to pick a place and tell us where we should go- poor guy haha. We ended up going to this BBQ place and had some food (it was so good I totally ate my entire sandwich- I should have been better about counting calories, but I hadn't had lunch that day so I had a few calories that could be used for dinner. So when we were asked about checks there was a married couple, Meaghan, myself and FC and Meaghan is like "they are together (to the married couple) and I'm on my own...." and she looks at me and I'm all "and we're separate". I didn't want to just assume that FC was going to pay for me and he looks at me and looks at the waitress and FC says "Um, we're together" haha It was nice to have someone pay for me. When I was with "The (ex) Boy" I ALWAYS paid for everything- even his so it was nice to be treated.

After we got done eating everyone else was going to head back down to Denver/Parker (its like a 2 hour drive to Parker from Fort Collins) and FC and I decided to go see a movie. I had a Fandango gift card that I had been trying to use for seriously 2-3 years so I offered to pay for the movie. We went and saw Identity Thief. It was a pretty funny movie- I enjoyed it. After the movie I didn't want to leave haha and FC still wanted to hang out so I left it up to him to plan what we were going to do next. So we ended up going to City Park. When we were driving he said "I'm sure you're wondering where we're going...We're just gonna go to a place I go to when I want to just think and have some time alone". So we got to the park, and there's a pond/lake that has a walking path around it. He usually takes his dog there for walks. We ended up just sitting and listening to music and talking for over an hour. I don't think I've ever been on a date with someone who was so respectful. He didn't try to get too "touchy feely" wasn't crossing any boundaries, etc etc. We just talked. We eventually talked about songs we like and I mentioned several and then said "Oh, I really LOVE the song Wanted by Hunter Hayes" and he's like "No way! I love that song!" So we pulled it up on YouTube on my phone and listened to it (you can't make the radio play any song you want by command so it was the best solution to wanting to hear the song haha). So afterwards, I made a comment that I had made a ringtone out of the song for my phone (I hadn't ever used it but made the ringtone so that I could use it if I ever wanted to) and maybe (if he was lucky) I would make it his ringtone. He didn't even skip a beat and said "yeah, that would be great...I might text you ahead of time and tell you to not answer your phone just so you can hear the song when I call you" (Sweet? I think so). So around 11:10 FC and I both decided that even though I didn't want to leave, I needed to head home (I had an hour and 15 minute drive home). So FC brought me back to my car (we had left it at the Brewery so that we could just take one car) and he gave me a big hug good bye and told me to call him when I got home. He didn't even try to kiss me- which I had really mixed feelings about at the time, but realized that he probably didn't kiss me out of respect, not necessarily because he didn't want to (I at least hope that it wasn't because he didn't want to haha!).

I called him when I got home and he told me that he really wants to see me again and I told him that we would work something out because I wanted to see him again too and then we said goodnight. I ended up texting him because I felt like the conversation was a little awkward just thanking him for the great company and that I had a great time and was looking forward to seeing him again. He responded with a similar text. We sent texts off and on all day yesterday, and then talked on the phone last night for a little over an hour and then I went to sleep. I'm trying to not get too involved too quickly or let my emotions get the best of me, but I do really like him and its nice to be told that you're liked in return. He seems like a really genuine guy and I'm excited to just get to know him better and see where it goes.

"The (ex) Boy" and I did talk yesterday (he had sent me a text message on Saturday RIGHT before FC showed up to meet me about how he hoped that we could still be friends but he would respect me if I couldn't but it had been really hard for him to not talk to me over the last 2 weeks). I told him that I really did want to stay friends, but just needed some time to move on and get a "new normal" established. He was completely understanding and fine with that which was good. He told me that he missed being able to call me after work and talk about his day and talk about whatever was going on - its nice to be missed and I'm wondering if he's realizing how involved we really were in each other's lives after not having me around for 2 weeks. I'm still not over it, and I'm not going to pretend that I don't miss him, but, especially after having such a great time with FC and seeing how well someone can treat me and show me that they really are interested in me and wanting to make me happy (and making it known that its very much intentional) I know that it will all be better in the long run and I'm going to be happier.

So I guess this is all for the Adventures of FC and Chrssy today, but, of course, I will keep everyone posted!

Until Next Time emoticon

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Sounds like an awesome date!!! I will tell you FC sounds like a really good guy and I know he didn't try to kiss you out of respect. As a good guy it is so strange to hear how common it is for guys to be all over women on a first date. Good guys really want to get to know you first and if there is a connection it is plenty time for that. It DOES NOT mean there aren't interested in fact its the opposite they are usually interested in something long term if they are taking the time to get to know you. Take it slow try not to get too involved and enjoy getting to know each other.

    1919 days ago
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    Sounds like you had a great time! I'm thrilled for you. ABSOLUTELY thrilled! Baby girl, you deserve a MAN! Not a boy. I'm glad you are moving on to better opportunities for long term happiness. It may not be FC, but your door is open and sunshine is peeking through.
    1919 days ago
    Wow, that was long! emoticon But since you posted this, I'm going to put my 2 cents in. I am so glad you had a great time. And I am glad that you have decided to move on. The worse thing we can do is try to hold on to someone who doesn't want to hold on to us. That being said, TAKE IT SLOW, REAL SLOW! See this guy, let him come see you, but don't jump in to fast. You want to meet some of his people, and his friends, so you can get an idea of who he really is. You want to make sure he is single and that will reveal itself in time. People who are being deceitful will not let you meet the other people in their lives. All I'm saying is there are a lot of people on these dating web sites just looking to score. So be very careful! emoticon
    1919 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/18/2013 3:56:51 PM
    Sounds like an awesome date!!
    1919 days ago
  • BIZZ27
    Well I know what you're going through with missing "the boy"... Even though you know the relationship wouldn't be that great since neither of you were really willing to go to the next step, you still miss the "company" and the stability of knowing someone else was there... I get that. But it does get better! And I'm SOOOO happy that you had a great weekend!!! Getting to spend some good quality time with quality people can sure refresh your mind! Even though I get it that you don't want to go "all in", I'm glad that you're not completely backing off... Sometimes, things fall in your lap for a reason, and when it feels that good for something out of the blue, you owe it to yourself to see what happens. Can't wait to read some more!!!!

    Miss ya!!
    1919 days ago
    Good for you. I'm a firm believer that you have to just get back out there. Not necessarily to jump into something serious but just to get out of the house, fill your time, and meet fun new people. You'll start to feel better about yourself. It doesn't take the pain away from losing someone you loved, but it helps "get over the hump" to meet new people and realize that somewhere, at some point, there's something terrific in store for you. Enjoy yourself and just don't take it too seriously. In my single days, I called this my "date-a-palooza". :) Sounds like you are right on track. Hugs to you! I know it's so hard.
    1919 days ago
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