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Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Happy hump day!

I am in week three of my stress-buster challenge. I’ve come a long way dealing with stress over the years but many times it still overcomes me. So I’m really working on it now.

Workouts really help! I try to get in two 15-minute walking breaks every day at work. It’s good to get away from the desk, clear my head and get a little refreshed. A good cardio and strength training workout really helps blow off pent-up steam!

This week I am working on choosing to be an optimist. That’s a lot harder than it sounds but I believe I can do this. I have more than one family member going through a difficult time right now and this is where I struggle but I’m really working on it. Normally right now, I would be wallowing. I would stop working out, shut down, watch TV and blame myself even though none of it has anything to do with me.

I read somewhere,” it’s not a bad day; there was a bad moment that you held on to all day”. I can’t remember the exact phrase but that was the idea. Looking back over the years I can remember being so overly dramatic about what a horrible time I was going through and thinking life was too unfair.

No question life was tough at that time; I have gone through some crap in my day. When I really think about it though, I can remember bright spots during that time as well. There were positive moments that I wish I had tuned into instead of wallowing in the bad times. I didn’t have to be so miserable. I didn’t have to let negative moments consume me but I did. I wish I could have chosen to turn away from negative influences.

But, what’s done is done. I cannot go back and fix anything, relive a past moment differently or change a bad decision I made. I know that is pointless. I know I must move forward every day being the best person I can possibly be now, take care of myself and support those I love, not berate myself for not being able to fix everything. I cannot hold on to a bad moment (or two or three) and tell everyone that I had a horrible day.

I’m running my second 5K on Saturday. Last year for this race, it was sunny and 70. This Saturday’s forecast… not so much. I’m fairly new to running and have never done a race in chilly weather. I’ve really been working on improving my strength and endurance over the past four months. I really have to keep reminding myself how far I have come. I still feel like the lazy couch potato I have been for many years and that’s just not true anymore! Only once in a while.

I was grumpy the other night watching the weather report. I went on and on about how horrible this is. I want it to be like last year, I’m too old for this. I immediately made myself shut up and told myself that it will still be a good day. I ran twice last week in chilly, damp weather and it wasn’t so bad after the first five minutes. I even improved my time with each run so I will dress right, I will be out there with everyone else who loves to run and my daughter is doing it with me. I will be thankful that I am capable of running and that no matter what my time is on Saturday, it will be a great accomplishment for me!

It’s exhausting being me. emoticon

But I'm worth it! emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Love your blog! It has really put my day into perspective and given me hope that I can change my attitude and make tomorrow a good day with only the odd negative blip - and not the other way around! THANKS! emoticon
    1924 days ago
    "Willed optimism": I believe it's possible and habit forming.
    1927 days ago
    Great attitude. Good luck tomorrow.
    1927 days ago
    All are welcome to hijack my blogs Suz! Jump right in the water's fine. emoticon

    Always love to read your thoughts!

    Like you, I have always been surrounded by negative people so I've been working on changing those habits in myself. Like Ghandi said, be the change you wish to see in the world.

    I like what you said about loonking back at the 5k. it will be so cool to finish. I'm glad my daughter is running with me. We always have a good time!

    1928 days ago
    I think about how I made life harder on myself and those around me years ago, but I think I've had an optimistic core. It took a lot of effort to make the shift as a whole and sometimes still takes a lot of effort to stay positive. I also wonder if some of it doesn't come with wisdom and age. Maybe it is because I've survived some horrible situations that I can use that knowledge to give me faith that things will be ok or at least that worry and stress aren't going to make the unchangeable any better? I don't know what it is. My parents are judgmental and negative. My husband is easy going but cynical. I sometimes wonder where my positivity (not that I'm always positive) comes from.

    I'm sort of going through a bummed out negative thing right now. I was going to blog it out, but I decided that it-was-what-it-was and there's not a lot to be gained so just put it away and move on. I don't mean suppress it. I just mean I'm choosing not to give it credit or give it a chance to grow by putting it out in the air. I don't think I'm explaining it well.

    Sorry, didn't mean to hijack your blog but you made me think a little more and I always like that.

    Good for you for not letting the threat of bad weather hold you back, especially after all the training and improvement. It's definitely a challenge but it will add character to the overall experience and your memories of this 5k. You'll think back..."remember that awful weather 2013 St. Pat's 5k and how good I felt for doing so well in site of less than perfect conditions."

    And good luck fighting away the negative stuff. I think you are more positive than you feel. You are very supportive and you post frequent updates about how you have overcome all those things to go for a run when it was cold or go to the gym when you didn't feel it, etc. I feel your positive energy and it often helps me. Thank you for sharing your positive with us.

    1928 days ago
    YES you are emoticon You have a GREAT attitude and I think I see you smiling emoticon Good luck on your race Saturday emoticon
    1928 days ago
    awesome attitude!
    1929 days ago
    Great write!! Love the HUGE positve here : ) Your a motivator!! Thanks for sharing and best of luck to you on Saturday!
    Ginny(gmondello) will send a friend you) emoticon
    1929 days ago
    Great point! Have an awesome 5K!
    1929 days ago
    I really like you and your blog, Kelliebean. Sure we have bad moments and why the heck not do our best to let them pass and look for the best.

    I do find that I have mended the past a bit too, by remembering and savoring the good times in even troubled relationships. It's a little like reclaiming what is mine from past years!

    And you of course know the saying, no bad weather, only bad clothes!! You certainly know the principle with your chilly damp weather runs! Way to go !! Proud to know you.
    1929 days ago
    Love the idea that there aren't bad days, just bad feelings we hang onto.

    1929 days ago
    Awesome attitude! And you are going to have a Terrific 5K. Enjoy!
    1929 days ago
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