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Please Excuse Me While I Complain............

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

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Those are all of the emotions I'm feeling these last few days. What the heck is going on??? I am thinking it is likely that my sudden symptoms of depression are due to quiting smoking (today is day 4). For example, yesterday there was an accident on the freeway, causing my hour long commute to be 90 minutes. I wanted to cry. Why? Not sure. I was headed to the walk in clinic to get my feet looked at so I was frustrated knowing that I wouldn't get home until late. I get to the doctors office and they said it would be about a 45 minute wait. 90 minutes later, I get to see the doctor. I didn't get home until 8. I ate dinner and went to bed - which meant tossing and turning for 2 hours before falling asleep.

Not to mention - I got the info I had been waiting for yesterday (several weeks ago I mentioned that I might have some big news). Well, one of my former bosses wants me to come work for him again, but at a different company. Same line of work. I originally quit the job with him because I hated the ownership, my hours and pay sucked, and I was offered something that seemed better. Took that job, which was even worse, but led me to the job I currently have. What's wrong with this job?? It is 30 miles away from home, my supervisor is a "mean girl", another co-worker is worse than that. And everybody likes to talk $#!%. I'm sick of it. Oh, and I'm a people person but talking is frowned upon in our office and my job is such that I have little contact with the outside world..

So, this other offer seems very tempting. MUCH closer to home, more money (though mostly commission based, so slightly risky), I'd get to be customer service/sales again. I told him I'd only come back if I could work days and have weekends off. Which he has told me is just fine. My fear is that taking that I could end up in a similar situation there. What if I hate my co-workers? What if they hate me? I didn't get very good looks from the women I'd share an office with when I was getting a tour of the building. It's in an industry with high turn over.... how will that affect me? Ugh... so many questions!!! So, I am meeting with my former boss after work today to see if I can get anything answered.

Oh, and the doc said exactly what I expected. Platar fasciitis. Foot stretches and anti-inflamitories (but since it took so long to see the doc, the pharmacies were closed so I can't pick up my prescription until tonight). No running for 2 weeks, minimum. I could really use a good run right now to clear my head!!!! Since I didn't sleep much last night I skipped the gym AGAIN this morning. I have to get back to it tomorrow!! I miss it! Those of you who have had plantar fasciitis - do you think the step mill is an acceptible form of cardio? Or walking at an incline? I didn't think to ask those questions last night. He did say I could do ST and yoga though.

The bright spot in my day - our new bed will be delivered and set up by the time I get home! I am hoping to sleep like a baby tonight! Then get to the gym tomorrow and kick some @$$. And hopefully feel like I have some control over life again.

Anyway - if you made it this far, thank you for reading my pitty party blog. In all reality I know I've got a great life and these are not real things to complain about. But right now - right now my emotions are all over the place and I am having a rough time. Thank you for understanding.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Sorry, I didn't see this blog yesterday. It makes sense that quitting smoking is probably messing with your emotions. Good luck on making a decision regarding the potential job! It is always such a big decision when you have to decide on leaving a job to go to another one. However, I am sure you will make the right decision and it will all work out the way it is supposed to.
    1866 days ago
    I go through days like that too where I just feel super emotional but don't really have a good reason why. It too shall pass. Its good you are also recognizing the positives going on and have a plan to kick the attitudes butt when you can :) good luck with the job decision. Change is always scary. I pretty much hate my job, but I like (most of) the people so I'm afraid to leave and have to work with people I don't like. I know it will all work out :)
    1866 days ago
    Hang in there. I had a friend who quit smoking and day 4 was the worst for her, craving-wise and emotionally! You made it past that now. It got a little better on day 5 and day 6 was way better. By about day 10 no more cravings or mood shifts. In case it helps, I think it was about a month after she quit, she almost had one. She didn't have cravings anymore and wasn't as on guard mentally about being strong like at the beginning. She was so close but didn't do it. She actually went to the gym to distract herself, so it was a win/win. Something to look out for though. Stay strong. I'm so proud of you!

    Crummy about the feet, but at least you know what it is now and can take action to improve it. I don't know much about it except it really hurts and stretching helps but I'm afraid I can't be too helpful with much advice.

    So, the job.....I say do it! A closer commute is always better. You're such a terrific people person too! It sounds like this job would really suit you better. Don't worry about the co-workers too much. It sounds like you wouldn't be leaving close friends, so take a chance on new ones. I'm so excited for you.

    Enjoy your sleep tonight on your new bed. I bet it will be heavenly!!
    1866 days ago
    KNEW it was plantar fasciitis, and you'd get prescribed some anti-inflammatories. OMG, you will not believe how much better your feet will feel!

    I'll look for the blog I wrote after I found out about mine. It had tips from my doc on how to take care of it properly. As far as cardio, my doc said to stick to walking, and when I did go back to running, to very gradually ease into it. You don't want to re-injure your foot.

    As far as the work situation, I'm sorry. Only you know what you need to do. What is Scott's opinion? Also if your current work atmosphere is that toxic, you need out. Even if the new work environment is toxic as well, at least you'd have a far shorter commute to help make up for it. Right now, you're spending so much time in the car, and that just doesn't seem healthy IMO.

    Definitely think you should discuss the work culture with your old boss. Maybe the other women were just having a crappy day, or there was an issue with a client or something like that.

    1866 days ago
    I hope that you got some of the answers you are needing from your old boss. I am all about lists. So when you get to the point to make the decision about the job. That is how I make most of my decisions.

    I am sorry about your foot. I am going through sort of the same thing. Since I work with a Chiropractor he has been stretching and working on it. No fun at all!
    1866 days ago
    No advice for the smoking.... lucky enough to ever have gone there. but I did have plantar fascitis.You shouldn't cause any further injury by doing the steps and the incline, but if it is causing you increased pain I would stop. What worked the best for me was doing two different kids of stretching exercised and I had an insert for both of my shoes to support the arch, thus taking some of the pressure off of that tendon. The only meds I took were Ibuprofen or tylenol for the pain, but I guess some docs prescribe anti-inflammatory meds if they think the tendon is quite aggravated. It took quite awhile, but if you do the stretches religiously you will definitely see an improvement. As far as the job, I would think closer to home is better than a 60 min commute. Lord knows I would hate to commute, it only takes me 10 minutes to get to work. Better pay sounds like a better deal and if people there don't like you they aren't worth knowing. It sounds like you are not happy where you are so it seems like it would be a change for the better.
    Good luck. I know you will make the right choice for whatever works best for you. emoticon emoticon
    1867 days ago
    Forgot to say have a good sleep in your new bed tonight too!!
    1867 days ago
    First of all congratulations on being on day 4 of no smoking. That's huge! Keep up the good work. I'm sorry to hear about your foot and I hope it gets better soon. And as for the job, I have a feeling you should take it, especially if you're not feeling great about the way your current job is going. You seem like you would have a great personality for sales and I think you would do great even if its commission based. Good luck with it all and keep us updated!
    1867 days ago
    Yes quitting smoking DOES do that to you but HANG IN THERE!!! After day 3 it WILL get easier (I'm on year 4 now) I was an emotional wreck for a bit after smoking. My poor girls didn't know whether to wind their butt or scratch their watch I was every which way and I'm a pretty even keeled person which made it worse. Ah well, they bought me a bird out of it. LOL

    Anyhows, it will subside. We were using the nicotine as a relaxer and your body just has to learn to do it on its own again.

    As for plantar ...I've had some mild cases of it (self diagnosed) and treated it like a torn tendon. Which seemed to work. So, I would say to "try" the steps and incline but seriously, if you find any discomfort, back off and let it heal. You know your limits even better than any doc.

    Until next time, you rock. You shall continue rocking so when life gives you lemons, throw it at the b*st*rd who handed it to you.

    1867 days ago
    Here's my two cents. Go for the new job. Even if your coworkers suck (most do) you're closer to home and will be possibly making more money. Those two things alone would sell me. I mean even if you like your co-workers now, they could leave and you could end up with just as crappy people to work with. It's all unpredictable. And if you are unhappy now, what harm can a little change do? But that's just my opinion. Do what feels right. And the Plantar Faciatis sucks! Hope I never have to endure that.
    1867 days ago
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