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Successes and not so much.....

Friday, March 08, 2013

I have forever posted my roller coaster of motivation. I will be motivated, have a plan, think that I have my act together this time but then I either don't act upon it or work really hard at it for a bit and then slide into my old ways again. In September it will be 7 years of being on Sparkpeople, and 16 years since my first diet that I can remember. I have always had a goal to be X weight by the time I am X years old. My age has crept up to 25, my weight bounced around. I feel like I need a clean start, to set low goals instead of extreme ones. I also need to find a way to accountable. My best time (although not so much losing weight but being consistent) was when I was doing challenges and had a buddy to keep me in check. When I was at home I had my brother to walk/run with. I live in a remote community, only accessible by plane. There is no one here to motivate me, there is no gym to go to, I can't walk the dog because there are wild dogs and wolves. I can only rely on myself. I've decided to make a list my non-successes (not failures!) and my successes over the past 7 years to help me get started:

- Weight is still around 340 lbs
- Still binge eating
- Still not working out consistently
- Still not happy with my weight

- Soda-sober for 3 years and counting!
- Helped my brother lose weight
- Helped my brother become physically active and eating better
- Learned that I can do anything if I put my mind to it
- Travelled the world, had amazing experiences
- Finished my degrees and started my career
- Learned that "low fat", "sugar free", "low carb" etc. does not always mean it is good for my body
- Learned about eating clean
- Learned to cook a variety of things
- Learned how to work out at home
- Ran for 5 MINUTES on the treadmill!!!!!!!!!
- Lost weight for the first time in my life (I gained it back but I learned that I could lose it)
- Felt the excitement of being a smaller size
- Felt the pain of gaining the weight back and having to suffer being a larger size
- Realized the things I cannot do/struggle doing because of my weight
- Tried new foods that I never would have thought I would like

Although I regained any weight I had lost, I also gain a ton of successes in my life. I have learned so much. I know what to do, now I just need to do it.

New Simple Goals:
- Do not buy any unhealthy food, what's in the house can stay and be eaten but nothing new comes in unless it is healthy
- Make one healthy swap a day
- Eat proper meals (no cereal for supper, no chips for lunch, etc.)
- Drink mostly water
- Try to track your meals
- Take your vitamins daily
- Eat fruits/veggies daily

- Complete the Quickfire challenge every day
- Do Sparkpeople video once a day
- Pay attention to your steps everyday, set a daily goal and reach it
- Do a workout during intermission when watching hockey
- When spring finally comes, walk to the store
- When you go home for summer run with your brother
- Start C25K or Zombies Run! 5K Training and don't give a crap what people think!

- Find a accountability buddy that you can rely on
- Use Spark Coach Daily
- Make a motivation collage
- Blog as often as possible to keep your head clear
- Remember why you are doing things, think before acting
- Join BLC in the Spring

I have no lose X lbs goal, I have no eat X amount a day, no X minutes a day. I just want it to be simple and doable. If I do a 5 minute SP video or a 20 minute video, either way I have hit my goal of doing a video a day. I'm am slowly learning what it truly means for this to be a lifestyle change. Before I was making changes I could not keep, I want to make changes I can. I want and need this to be permanent. I can't say I will never have sugar again, there is no way that will happen. After I got rid of soda, I got rid of everything but tea and water. That was fine for over a year, until I wanted something else. Getting rid of one simple, horrible for me thing was simple (I still crave it but I know I don't need it). Getting rid of a category of things, or limiting myself to only a few things is horrible.

Here's to a nice, simple start to a change in my life, this time hopefully permanent!

P.S. Yesterday I had a small victory, I have been drinking A LOT of chocolate milk lately and yesterday I didn't buy any! Then I was going to buy chocolate syrup but I didn't do that either!! There is nothing in it that my body needs, I wasn't even craving it, I've just got into the habit of getting it, but no more!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Well, that's a whole lot of goals. When I make lists like that it's setting me up for failure. I hope you did better than I do!

    Like you I set "deadlines" er I mean, goals. Wanted to be normal weight by 35 . . . wanted to be fit by forty . . .Joined SP at 46 and wanted to lose it all and be physically fit in 2 years, but was building in an extra two years of margin in case it took longer so I could STILL make it and still be fit by fifty.

    I was 315 and lost alot. But I'm still morbidly obese.

    So here's what I do now. I work on one Lifestyle Change at time. I continue to learn more about food. I work on personal organization first (cooking from scratch and time in schedule to take walks, personal routines 3X a day to get everything done to keep personal life on even keel). And I work on personal life goals first. From focusing on those 2 things, I have the support system and the motivation and ability to work on attaining a normal BMI.

    Lots of small changes, which add up to LifeStyle Change.

    I've slipped lately on personal organization; so that's the LifeStyle Change I'm focusing on for the month of May.
    2353 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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