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Comparing myself is not good...or is it?

Monday, March 04, 2013

Wow, my first blog entry!

I want to start by saying that I am so excited to start losing what's weighing me down...and it's not just the physical weight. I was scared to join and ask for motivation, but just by reading so many motivational posts by others, it really gives me a sense of hope! I created my first post of a group forum asking for friends and soon after had a response! I love how complete strangers can reach out and help others. It's something almost unknown to me.

So, I digress. Onto the subject of this blog entry.

There are many reasons that have pushed me to become seriously involved with the SP community, mostly for support and accountability. This week however, I had a huge motivator which may seem unhealthy to most people, but I'm not totally convinced. I used to be best friends with this girl (Kate) in college. In those years I was fit and thin while Kate was overweight and I became her motivator. I wanted to help her to not feel uncomfortable in her own skin. Unfortunately we moved away from each other after college, but stayed close. We both gained even more weight, but only one of us decided to make a healthy change and it wasn't me. I was so angry that she did this without me and was actually succeeding! Kate was going to be healthier, skinnier and more confident than me for the first time since we became friends and I was alone. I made a huge mistake and lashed out at her by basically saying she didn't need my support. And she left me to be with myself in my own sulking world. Why wouldn't she? I was completely negative and ruining her mojo. But what she didn't know was how much that hurt me too.

Recently, after 2 years we've reconnected over FB and she's lost almost 100 pounds and looks great. I've lost 2. Needless to say, this has set a fire under my butt (is that the expression?), but in a good way. I want to have the best positive outlook and be able to support the friends I make on here. And unlike Kate and unlike the person I used to be, I won't abandon my friends when they need help. And I really hope my SP friends will do the same for me. I'm willing to say it freely now...that I need friends...I need support....I need motivation.

WHO'S WITH ME??? (Said in a Mel Gibson voice from some movie like Braveheart)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You're right, Jen. I think I do sell myself short sometimes. I need to think about my own health and goals. It's really hard for me to find motivation without it being competition with someone else....whether it's a friend or a Victoria's Secret model (but we all know that there's no competetion I think you really just made me change my thinking! But now I need help with "retraining" my motivational region of my brain. Any ideas? Thoughts? This might be my next blog...haha.

    1907 days ago
  • JEM2929
    Awesome first blog entry! I love how honest you are.

    It's too bad that the reality of things is that weight can sometimes get in the way of friendships and relationships but the important thing is you were able to reconnect. It's not really fair to yourself though to compare you with a friend. I think when we do that we end up selling ourselves short. Don't sell yourself short buddy :)

    1907 days ago
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