Feeling hurt...need advice

Monday, March 04, 2013

Ok, so for the last few months I have had an issue with a "friend", I dont know if I can really call her a friend anymore... but all this time I thought we were friends, I knew there was alittl tension between us, but I have always been nice to her...but then the last couple months she has really been rude and has been talking about me behind my back and I was told by a couple people that she had told them that they should not be friends with me, one that I have known for almost a year now and the other just recently joined hero house, both telling me the exactly same thing....so I approched her about this and she denied it straight out...she told me that they probably misunderstood...now that would have made sense if it was just one person that told me, but this is two seperate people, both who did not know each other at the time...I just dont see how they can both tell me the exact same things months apart and seprate and both be misquote her....I trust the one woman who I knew for almost a year, she doesnt lie to me and she is a very bright lady, she wouldnt just confuse what was being said....
Now the issue I have is how do I deal with this...I told her what I heard and how I felt about it, and told her I would appriciate her not talking about me like that again, but I dont think she really got it, she just outright denied it and lied about it...I am so confused and feel so hurt that she would treat me like that and make me feel that I am so horrible, atleast making others see me that way,I would never do that to her, infact I have always been nice to her, been there for her so many times...I just dont know what to do now....anyone got any suggestions, what would you do?

Thanks for listening...big warm angel hugs...
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  • ANYVAR54
    Monika, I feel for you. When friends betray us it is always a sticky situation. And this friendship may not be able to be reconciled. But I think you should at least tell her that you have sensed some tension between you, and ask if there is anything that you have done to offend her. If she says no, you have to decide if you want to continue the friendship.
    We do not need to continue to be spend time with people who mistreat us, and you don't want to add any more wood to the fire. I hope that you can resolve this, but if she does not cooperate, then go and enjoy your other friends. She may just be jealous that you are popular.
    1870 days ago
  • SHOES17
    1870 days ago
    I am sorry for your pain. You have done everything you can to mend your relationship. One of the most difficult things to do, for many is to realize that you are valuable and deserve respect. If she is not treating you well, then it may be that the time your friendship was intended has expired. Sometimes it is necessary to let go and focus on more nurturing relationships. The time you spend with this person can change in perspective. There doesn't necessarily need to be animosity just a shift in boundaries.

    1870 days ago
    Sending healing prayers for you... emoticon
    1870 days ago
    The same has happened to me and if you have a choice, don't be part of her life anymore. Surround yourself with people who respect you and love you. emoticon Chelsea
    1871 days ago
    I think I would give it some time and see what happens. It doesn't sound like she wants to be much of a friend to you anymore. I would still be nice to her (and everyone else), but I wouldn't go out of my way to be friends with her. If it goes on much longer, you could just ask her if you did something that offended her. Maybe she will open up and tell you what is going on. She probably did say those things that the others told you that she said, so something is going on with her. Let us know how it all works out.

    1871 days ago
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