Week 1 Success and downer...

Monday, March 04, 2013

So I made it through the first week - 2 days of TRX and 2 days of Zumba....
Then I had a down moment when a co-worker seeked me out to ask if she could come in and do TRX with me in the mornings.... I tried to explain to her how much I wanted to do this on my own and how much it took me to get to the point of asking for help from Shawn.... I just want to do this for myself... I feel like a huge part of my weight is the fact that I always put everyone else first.... of the first time in a long time, I'm putting myself first and doing something just for me... and I don't want anybody else butting in on this time...
I realize that she could push me more, but she could also steal my thunder and make me slack....
so I basically told her I didn't want anybody else to join me... and then spent the weekend feeling guilty.... so last night I sent her a FB message volunteering to go in early on M-W-F to walk with her and do workouts.... but that I just wanted my T-Thr workouts on my own... I haven't heard back from her...
So am I selfish? Should I have been happy that somebody also wanted to work out with me? Should I have encouraged her rather than flat out saying 'no'... I mean it's not like it's my personal weight room... or anything... but damn it, it's taken me 2 years to finally work up the nerve to ask for help... I don't want to share that....
And I honestly think I'll work hard so that I won't disappoint Shawn.... after all, he's getting up early and driving in for me! I'm going to work my ass off for him!
I hate feeling selfish... but darn it, I deserve this!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    No, I don't think you are being selfish. It was generous of you to include her in your morning walks. When someone has 1 on 1 training, it's just that! 1 on 1! Glad you have found the courage to get help, but I'm with you on the 1 on 1. I'm kind of embarrassed at my klutziness. I'd just as soon not have others watch me learn stuff.
    emoticon emoticon


    2241 days ago
    You do deserve this! Keep up the good work! emoticon
    2242 days ago
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