Day 3 of Blogging- How will you keep on track?

Monday, March 04, 2013

The question is How will you encourage yourself and keep on track.

So, I'm talking in general, not about the new taking-my-vitamins habit. And this is a perfect topic for me today because my weight this morning is right back up where we started this challenge! no!!! NO!!!!!! And frankly, I don't deserve it. There, I've said it. Yes, I did have a wonderful dinner out Saturday night that included some rolls and some wine and a real grasshopper (made with ice cream!) for dessert but I also chose the scallops instead of the steak and the steamed veggies instead of the baked potato. By my calculations, I had a calorie overage of about 500 calories that day. NOT 7000! I know that the salt alone in restaurant foods will cause the scale to rise but that usually dissipates quickly. We're two mornings after and my lovely and well earned 148 has morphed into 150. That's where I am this morning. Back at square one.

So, yeah, how do I keep on track in the face of that? There is no rhyme or reason to it. Or at least there seems to be none. I error on the side of counting too many calories and I also error on the side of counting too few for exercise. My little fitness trackers agree that I am a very active, high calorie burning machine. And yet, I get 150. As I stood on that scale there was a moment when I thought, "just f*ck it! I give up!". (I am a beast pre-caffeine.) And lately I keep getting these niggling little, fleeting little thoughts coming through my head that being chubby isn't so bad, people kind of expect it of me even. It wouldn't be so bad to go back to size 18, even 20.

But then, I think about her. You know who I mean. You all have a "her", the skinny you, who's out there in the future waiting for you to come by and get her and BE her. Some of you have been her already and strive to be her again. For some of you, for now at least, she's an invention of a better life, a vision of what can come. I've been her for a minute back in the early 2000s. So, I know her. She's cute and wears awesome clothes and feels good about herself and people treat her much differently than people treat me. And she can do amazing things. Because she's healthy and fit and doesn't have extra weight to lug around. She's a size 8 and can go shopping and find ZILLIONS of things that work, instead of coming away with nothing like I usually do. And she's a lovely person. She's not all stressed out about weight and exercising and logging every dam thing she eats. She's learned what she needs to do to stay fit and she does it, not because she's got somewhere she needs to go but because she's there and wants to stay there.

So, that's why I track, I exercise, I agonize, I get pissed off, I make excuses, I fail, I keep looking, I get off my butt and work out. I want to be her. It's that simple.


Want to thank all the Casual Travelers for lavishing me with Spotlight attention yesterday! Was nice!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I easily fluctuate by as much as 5 lbs. just from morning to night! It probably is salt and you will back down 2 lbs by morning;)
    2710 days ago
    Trust me it is the salt.. I can bloat up 5-6 pounds if I eat out. And knowing that we are the same age I can safely let you know it takes a few days to get it back off. Just take a deep breath and stay on track. You can do this. It is just trickier at our stage of life. But it will be so worth it when we make the goal emoticon
    2710 days ago
    I could shower you with all the "you can do it " and all the "hugs" i could say all kinds of things but all I will say is this ... That pissed off feeling is going to be the one to get where you want to be . It is that pain in the pit of stomach when you cant go no more and that number 150 pops up in your head it makes you go further ... So cheers to being pissed off ... you rock emoticon Yea i had to leave you hug because they dont hurt either
    2710 days ago
  • POPSY190
    My weigh in wasn't good either. Expletives deleted!!! But, like you, I prefer the future me to the past one. I'm trying to use this week of habit blogging to recover the habits I used for success. Now I just need a large dollop of patience!
    Today's aim is to set up my favourites section of the food tracker so that it's less of a mission to fill in each day.
    Like The Bruce, for most of us it's, "if at first you don't succeed, then try, try, and try again! emoticon emoticon
    2710 days ago
    Sorry to have missed your spotlight day!!!! I was crazy busy, but I still hate I missed it. So what other non-scale successes do you see? Have your measurements changed? Are you feeling any different?

    Good for you for picking yourself back up and fighting to get back to "her"...you in the skin you want to wear. LOL

    2710 days ago
    Great blog, T! I threw in a few expletives of frustration which you forgot! (you're welcome...anything to help! lol) It is so darn frustrating...I put on a "happy" face & my mouth makes all the right sounds ("the scale is deranged", etc. ) but sheesh, it's a pain!

    Thoreau said, "Hope springs eternal." and let's hope he's right and that we never run out of optimism. Goin' the other direction sure won't get us where we wanna go!!!

    So I'm off the gym...and starting Day 28 of my streak....onward, onward, onward! lol
    2710 days ago
    2710 days ago
    Great post no better motivator then ones self
    2710 days ago
    Great self motivator!
    I have to give myself a good talking to from time to time! emoticon
    2710 days ago
    I love how you motivated yourself right back up. Great job. A wonderful blog - I think many of us here on Spark can relate to.
    2710 days ago
    You are so awesome. You ranted and raved and built yourself right back up. Bravo! You know, the problem with weighing yourself often can be as simple as what you ate the day before such as cheese, pickles or other things higher in sodium that cause water retention. It's water, not weight, and it will come off, because you were cheated. I have stomach issues and sometimes I work amazingly hard and I don't show a loss, even though I deserve one, because my system is "backed up" and water retention goes along with that for me. But once I've roto-rotered myself, the loss comes with a vengence, so I try not to get upset about it. It's how my body works. And I never want to go back up. I'm right about where you are, 150, and on my way down!!!!! Hang in there.
    2710 days ago
    Great blog sista!
    2710 days ago
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