QUILTINGB52
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Choices....

Saturday, March 02, 2013

Once again sleep eludes me and journaling always seems to help me unclutter my mind....

When I arrived in Assisted Living - someone asked "Was it your choice to come here?"

Does anyone chose to have health challenges over life and living?

What the youth of today don't understand ~ that in a blink of an eye ~ life as you once knew can change drastically and not for the better. So many events in our lives that we take for granted, like standing and walking. Once these simple tasks are snatched away ~ life just seems to keep spinning out of control (or at least feel that way).

Moving to Assisted Living was like giving up!!

Retirement is NOT supposed to happen like this...Instead, Wayne and I should be tucked safely inside the motohome, exploring the open road - with the sun at our backs, the wind in our hair and wondering what new excitment will be around the next bend in the road.

So, NO ~ I did NOT Chose to come here!! Circumstances brought me down this path....

When I said I could easily live with my computer, sewing machine and bed ~ NEVER did those thoughts include being sucked dry of everything I have saved for, to live in a place where time and family and friends forget that you ever exiested.......
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SAMI199
    I know you are dealing with very painful & chronic conditions-certainly not your choice-I get how frustrating it is to be confined & isolated by these "challenges". I'm sorry you are going through such a hard time-feeling forgotten by family & friends is the worst. You always have us,though-send me a sparkmail anytime & I will see it-I don't always check your page everyday -Keep reaching out-you know how much I care about you & as always-I think you are an amazing lady!

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    2080 days ago
  • GEORGIA_KAY
    Annie, my dear one, I'm so sorry that you're so sad. I've been away for a bit (as I sometimes do) and was wallowing in my own problems, as I've gotten older I'm having to face up to my own shortcomings and limits, and like you, my physical limitations sure can make me feel down and depressed.................but, I want you to know that I'm sorry if I contributed in any way in making you feel forgotten. I never meant to. I would never want that for you.

    I wish you and Wayne could be traveling to see the world too. I truly do. And I'm going to pray that it does come true, and that you get stronger and healthier enough to make it possible.
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    2080 days ago
  • QUILTINGBUDDY
    Oh Annie I'm so sorry to hear of the difficulties you are going through right now. I know you have worked so hard on your health and yet here you are. I wish there was something I could do to help. I will be praying for your health to improve as it seems like you are just too darn young to be in assisted living. I hope you can find a way to regain your strength and get back to the life you had planned. I know you have people to see, places to go and quilts to make etc. Hang in there and keep working. Do everything your physical & occupational therapists tell you to do.
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    Hugs,
    ~Karla
    2088 days ago
  • GCHUNG
    Annie - I'm totally with you - that's it is not a choice but often it is a reality. Hopefully this is a short transition where you and Wayne will be back exploring the possibility of those open roads. My thoughts are with you often and I hope you are slowly improving. I see life signs of you occasionally on the boards and it always makes me smile. You can do this!! And it too will pass. Best of luck, my friend. Keep blogging!
    2089 days ago
  • no profile photo KLMEL2010
    Does anyone chose to have health challenges over life and living?

    No, no one chooses that. I am so sorry things are so difficult for you now. I don't know you very well, only via your writings on SP, but I don't believe for one minute that your family and friends have or will forget you. (Though I do think that as we get older, we all become more "invistible" to the world in general.)

    I guess all I do know is that we have to deal with our circumstances the best we can. And sometimes we feel positve and upbeat about it and sometimes we don't. I hope that venting here today helps. Karen

    2089 days ago
  • DAWNWATERWOMAN
    Annie, I wish I lived closer too. We could do some crafts together. I hope that you are taking time to count your blessings as well as recognizing your problems. I know it sounds cliche but there always is a silver lining. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Love ya
    2089 days ago
  • MEME102
    You're right -- blogging does help - somehow seeing it in print always makes it seem a little less 'awful'... There isn't a day that goes by that I don't pray for my SP friends -- you being a favorite of course! So for what that's worth - please know that I do! Wished I lived closer I'd come and visit you on those days. We'd have a great time laughing at some stories of some past time leaders and such!!! :))
    2089 days ago
  • SPSPSP1
    I'm sorry that you are feeling down, but it's good that you are writing out your frustrations.

    You asked, "Does anyone chose to have health challenges over life and living?". To a degree, yes. By choosing refined foods like sugar, white flour, etc. or not exercising enough, etc., we do choose to have health challenges. Obviously, no matter what, our bodies will change over time, but we can stem the deterioration to some degree.

    Now that you have listed all your frustrations and anger, can you find ways to enjoy your life? I know it can be tough, but what's the alternative? To be angry for the rest of your life? I truly wish you the best.
    2089 days ago
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