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Feb 25th

Monday, February 25, 2013

I was at the gym the other day, doodling around on the arc machine, waiting for my training session to begin. When suddenly, I saw it: the most perfect female stomach I have ever seen, right there in my gym!! I was awed! Not only did her stomach look perfect, but she had a great tan, one this white girl will never achieve in a lifetime. And she sauntered by, wearing a sports bra and tight yoga pants. Again, something I would never be able to do. Such perfection, right in front of me!!

Before you think that I've decided to leave my hubby of 32 years, let me tell you that I can admire a female form, especially if it's my idea of perfection, without wanting to jump the fence. Believe me, I kept my eye on her periodically, wanting to know what she did, so I could copy her every move. She effortlessly talked to her friends while on the bike, her perfect legs pumping like pistons; I clawed my way from one tenth of a mile to another, praying James, the trainer, would get there before I ran out of steam. She sauntered from one machine to another, while I hoped I didn't trip, again, getting off the arc. She didn't even seem to break a sweat, even though I knew she must have put in hours and hours to look that good. Me, a few reps with the weights, and I look like I'm going to pass out. I know, because the gym is plastered with mirrors, and they don't do me any favors.

When James finally arrived, I told him that I found the person I wanted to look like, the body that I had in mind when I started this weight-loss journey. When I finally saw her again, still cycling away, I pointed her out to James, and he told me to stop right there: he said he knew her family, had trained her cousin, and the reason she looked that slim and fit was because she was a Percoset issue... (Am I allowed to say that? If not, I'm sorry, because I don't want to single out a specific company. It's not the drug that's bad, it's how people use it.)

Well, that closed that conversation right off. James works hard for the body he has, and he makes sure I work hard for the body I hope to have one day. He told me to not even think about going down that road. But I kept thinking about this 'perfect specimen' of a woman, and I can see how the easy fix is so appealing to so many people. Take a pill, sprinkle a powder, let someone else do your thinking for you, and all your weight problems will be gone. It always sounds so easy! And have to admit, I do wish some days that this process was easier than it has been, than it will continue to be in the future. Some days it seems like I work so hard, and the scale doesn't budge. Or I dream of the foods I have given up, the foods that I no longer call my friend. Or I think of my poor knees, of the aching days, the uncomfortable nights I have had since I joined SP.

But like another other quick fix, the results will stop as soon as the fix is taken away. I'm really not the type of person who wants to be on any sort of pill the rest of my life, who would so willingly give away my power of choice to live my own life, even if it means giving up donuts and brownies forever. So I will keep looking for this perfect-looking woman when I'm at the gym, and I'm sure I'll heave a few sighs of disappointment that I don't look like that. But at the end of the day, I know I'll be better for it.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Thanks Becca you are so funny and it helps to know other people go through similar feelings. And there are delicious healthy goodies too, thy take more time to prepare but once I have made own homemade healthy versions the other stuff doesn't even tempt, doesn't even taste long as I only taste it..which I try not to do that but I have noticed if I go ahead and eat something even though it doesn't really taste good ...I get hooked on it again .... thanks so much again for your truth through humor! :-)
    1913 days ago
    Lol I would rather work hard than be addicted to pills. I don't get the whole pain pill addition thing. They take away some degree of my pain but other than that I feel like crap on them!
    Just keeping working hard you will,get there without unhealthy additions!,,
    1914 days ago
    I absolutely love this! I go through the exact same thing often, wishing and dreaming of that amazing body that seems so easy for other people and yet seems so unattainable. The constant internet searches of new "miracle" products to see if they really work. Only you need to think about the effort and work you are putting in, that you can truly say you earned that body when you finally get there and that on top of it all you have every tool necessary to keep it, because you know how hard it was to get there.
    1914 days ago
    Lol..I am the same way! I am a completely heterosexual woman who admires the physiques of other women who work hard on their bodies! It is always motivation for me to work a little harder!
    1914 days ago
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