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Sunday, February 24, 2013

Tell the truth, you sometimes have absolutely NO motivation.

I know I didn't this past week. But, with my Mother in the hospital, I could have cared less if all I had was Mt. Dews or Mt. Dew Speedway Freezes. Yep, that's what I had with the exception of 1 day that I had a Subway club sandwich. While she was in the hospital, I wasn't hungry. Plus, I figured those high calorie/high sugar drinks would tell my body I wasn't starving it.

So when today's weigh in came, I wasn't sure what I would see.

I had lost 1 pound. Okay, I'll admit I wasn't thrilled. I mean, I was glad I hadn't gained. But, 1 pound, seriously? But, I'll take it, gladly!

I'm planning my parent's 50th wedding anniversary party.

and believe me, I'm stressed 24/7! Will she become ill again and miss the party? My brother might get yet another bowel obstruction and be hospitalized. Will there be more people show up than not? Shoot, I know worry gets me nowhere except wrinkles and heartburn!

I guess the thing that I'm stressing over the most is whether or not I will lose maybe another 10lbs by the party.

I know it's THEIR day of celebration. But, my family and friends know me only as FAT. And when they walk in, I want it to be a WOW! moment when they see me. I guess I'm being selfish, but they only know me as fat. Yes, I'll still be fat but not AS FAT. Of course, they won't know all the sweat and tears that is ongoing to lose this weight. They won't know that one of my motivations is

or that I fight a daily battle with my scale. . .

I guess I shouldn't care what they think, but I do. That's one of my faults. I care what people think about me. Of course, there are some people I don't a rats patooey what they think about me.

So, now that Mother is out of the hospital and I didn't gain weight during this past week but did lose 1lb,

Yes, join me. I need you kicking my patooey! Oh, and I dropped my YMCA form into the mail so hopefully within this next week, I'll find out what the fee will be, and will begin another new trek along my journey.

So whenever you are feeling like your journey is impossible, just remember

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LEHIA13
    Congratulations on the one pound loss.

    I know how you feel about wanting to impress someone, but it's better to impress ourselves.

    I love all the pictures.

    2218 days ago
    I always enjoy reading your blogs. We all try to say we don't care what others think, but of course we do. You have a lot of people who think the best of you and read your blogs for the encouragement they provide . Your captions are always awesome, today I really like the scale photo. So true.
    emoticon emoticon

    2218 days ago
    Glad to hear you lost another pound.....I wish I could say the same! My weight has been going up and down 2lbs for the past 2 weeks at least......Last night I ate more than I normally do; a little out of the range and not particularly all good food either, ( it was a throw your hands up in the air kind of day)and plan on eating at the higher end of my range (healthier) the next couple of days to see what happens......

    I can relate to your feelings about caring what other people think!
    2218 days ago
    Change your mind, change your life. You are not fat, never were - you were in an unhealthy state & are now becoming healthy - beauty from the inside out. Be your own best friend & toot your horn because you deserve a


    for all your hard work!
    2219 days ago
    The slow turtle wins the race - remember that! You are a winner because despite all the problems you stayed resolute. This is what counts! And YES, nothing is impossible!
    2219 days ago
    emoticon emoticon
    2219 days ago
    One pound at a time!
    2219 days ago
  • MARIANNE9855
    I think you are doing great None of us live in a bubble you have your parents and I do too. We are succeeding anyway on a slow pace sometimes better than others. You are an amazing caring and beautiful woman and an inspiration to others. emoticon
    2219 days ago
    2219 days ago
    Hi Girl!
    You speak for a lot of us! Hopefully though, you can put that worry to rest - at least for some short periods of time. Feeling stressed always makes everything worse! Trust me - I know from what I speak!

    The fact that you lost a pound is great! Due to circumstances, you basically took leave from the program completely and yet still - you lost some weight! I am still working on not letting the scale dictate whether it's a good day/week or not. Slow and steady wins the race.

    Btw -- love your new picture! You look great! emoticon
    2219 days ago
  • JMC155
    Thank you for the reminder about IMPOSSIBLE. I had forgotten that quote, even though I have it on my fall office photo. Guess I need to find another photo and put it on that one too.
    2219 days ago
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