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Wiser and Wiser

Friday, February 15, 2013

Today's SparkCoach challenge is to write yourself a letter. The focus is to stop negative self talk and replace it with encouraging words; being your own best friend. I did it, but it wasn't easy to stay positive. I need to improve it and I'm not putting it in a blog, at least not yet.

I'm really good at what Dr. Judith Beck (The Beck Diet Solution) calls giving yourself credit. I love to celebrate accomplishments and SP helps me do that --healthy streaks of all kinds (sleep, water, exercise, freggies, calorie range), monthly trophies (SparkPoints, perfect attendance, consistency, exercise minutes, Trivia), scale victories, the kid's accomplishments (Gwen saying phrases ["I don't know" and "Not now" are new this week] and Natalie scoring 18 out of 18 on her math test and getting a "Super" on her written sentences), my published story, and work calling me yesterday to ask me for help after I've been gone nearly two years. I'm approaching 4 years of maintaining an 80 pound weight loss. I'm going to celebrate big. And the fact I'm trying to lose a couple more pounds is not going to dampen that celebration!!

But I haven't totally gotten over the negative self talk and getting really disappointed in myself. I'm working to replace those negative thoughts, especially those I pay attention to, with more positive acceptance of myself as I am. And I want to do this acceptance while being open and accepting of more progress. I don't want to say that I'm a binge eater and will always be a binge eater. I want to say that I'm doing better and better at staying within my calorie range and I'm making wiser and wiser food choices. Because I am!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    1945 days ago
    This is so exciting. You truly give me inspiration and hope....not to mention a good spur to my backside more than once! [needed!]
    1947 days ago
    Isn't it amazing that we can have a fantastic day filled with small victories and make one small mistake and that is all we focus on? I love that you have learned to celebrate and share your victories. I'm going to try to do that too!
    1947 days ago
  • _LINDA
    The main thing is you are doing things well enough consistently enough that you are maintaining.. For four years? That is pretty darn awesome and shows that you are a success!! Slips ups? We all have them. Big deal. We are only human and we always make mistakes. But the main thing is how we are doing overall. The story is in the statistics. The weight stays off -you can feel really awesome and proud of yourself -no negative self talk necessary. Life's bumps and detours are unimportant, its making sure you stay on the road that is important. You are doing it!
    Keep up the fabulous work!
    1948 days ago
    You are doing so great and deserve all the Beck-style "giving yourself credit". Interesting that this can be disjunctive from "positive self talk". I'm with Barb: it's a neutral fact that you struggle with binging, it's a hugely positive fact that you are tackling this head on and reducing the frequency/severity.

    Thanks so much for the new ski goodie! I've got a 3 day weekend -- 3 days to ski!!
    1948 days ago
    I so hear you! Our minds are something else. They can make or break our mood. Funny thing is that we can learn to control our thoughts. I am working on that myself lately. I am trying hard to be positive as well. I think it really makes for a better life. We have to learn to not be too hard on ourselves. For me I need to count my blessings!
    Have a terrific week end.
    1948 days ago
    It is good to know that I am not alone on this journey! Thanks for sharing your progress and experience! emoticon
    1948 days ago
  • CINDYW1102
    I think we all struggle with the negative self-talk - I know I do. have overcome a huge battle! You have lost and kept off 80lbs!!! Thats a whole other small person! That is not a small accomplishment! emoticon
    1948 days ago
  • FROSTY99
    emoticon Look at all you have accomplished! Bask in your success and celebrate big time on your anniversary (not necessarily with food!).

    1948 days ago
    It is sometimes difficult to make that balance, as you have identified, between being honest about facts (Hi, my name is Barb, and I am a compulsive eater)... and values attached to that (it is neither positive nor negative, just a fact).

    You have done wonderfully well, and I join your celebration of four years in maintenance! Woo-hoo, indeed! emoticon
    1948 days ago
    What a photo - the victory just jumps out! What an addiction negative self talk is-I am struggling greatly with it right now. It helps to know that I am not alone. We can kick it! emoticon
    1949 days ago
    1949 days ago
  • MIRAGE727
    You know I'll let you know when I see that negative, Marsha!
    1949 days ago
  • -AMANDA79-
    It is hard to find a balance where you can acknowledge your mistakes and hold yourself accountable, but not dwell on them.

    1949 days ago
    You absolutely ARE!!
    1949 days ago
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