100,000-149,999 SparkPoints 130,086

equal to the effort

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

I know I've not been "active" as of late... posting or keeping up with friends, so it may be that there is no one out there who will read this. I would like to say that I will be more active and I hope I will, but things are SO different now from when I was posting every day and being so active. And it has been hard. Really Hard. HARD. To be active on Spark People. To be active in my life.

I've been losing and gaining the same 5 pounds since August.
It's been annoying.

And then, last night, as I was lying awake in my bed, I realized... my weight loss is equal to my effort. I'm putting in the effort to maintain my weight. I'm doing great at putting in the effort to maintain 140-145. But, I am not putting in the effort to lose those last few pounds. Those last few pounds will not be lost with THIS level of effort. I haven't been running in weeks and weeks. Let alone a long run.

That "Iron Girl" medal I'm planning on earning this spring won't be earned with this level of effort. (It's running two local half marathons that are a week apart.) I'm seriously not in the shape to do that. I'll hurt myself if I were to try. I'm going to have to start training if I am going to do that. Training means effort. More effort than I've been putting forth.

So, I need to decide. Do I want to put in the effort to equal the results I want? Or, am I content with my level of effort and stay at 140-145? I'm 5'7, so I'm at a healthy weight. At this point, it is about deciding where I want to be. I also know that I am not in a place to make those decisions today. I'm suffering with the wonderful stomach flu, again. I've been so sick this winter, it sucks. I need to figure out how to stop getting so darn sick.

I'm super glad I have had this epiphany. I can keep mulling it over. I can make a decision about my level of effort over the next week or so as I heal and get well.

In other news, I spent this last weekend in Kansas with my parents. Amelia and I met them in Wichita for my grandmother's 99th birthday.

(you can't even tell I had a migraine. I'm pretty pleased with that!)

Amelia turned 1 on February 1st. We cut her bangs on February 2nd. She needed to be able to see. It took me a long time to get used to it.
Joshua has been sick with the Norovirus too. The doctor says he should be able to go back to school tomorrow. I hope so.

Well, lovelies... I'm going to sign off.
I'm going to keep mulling over that effort thing and then decide. Do I want to put forth the extra effort to lose and then maintain that extra loss? There's that new jogging stroller just taking up space...
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hey girlie!!!! I've missed you and was happy to come back and see a post waiting from you...I think you've got a good thing going here - taking some time to think about what you want and what you need to do. Having two kids is a lot different than just having one and you've been through a lot with moving and sickness and everything else.

    The one thing you need to realize is that you look FABULOUS!!! Now it's just deciding if those last couple pounds matter and what your future fitness goals truly NEED to be.

    Good job and hope you're all doing better!!!! Hugs and kisses to you, my friend!
    1929 days ago
    WOW, I'm glad you recognize that you haven't stepped up your game to get to the level you want to achieve. I had this very conversation with someone two days ago, because they're going through the same 5lbs up and down situation as you. We all have trouble stepping out of our comfort zone and giving it a little more steam. But guess what? You've gotta get that IronGirl!!! I want one too!!! Sparkpeople has a cool quote that goes like this: "It's hard gaining weight. It's hard maintaining weight. It's hard losing weight. Choose your hard!"
    1950 days ago
  • MARTY728
    Have a emoticon day!
    1951 days ago
  • MARYBETH4884
    You do look great! You need to do some soul searching. Remember this is a lifestyle not a diet. How important is running to you and if you give it up what exercise will you do to maintain your weight? Take your time with your decision it looks like you are maintaining your weight now. Maybe maintain for a while and when the kids are a little older you may have more time to devote to running and training. Enjoy your journey, where ever that takes you!
    1952 days ago
    You look great! Its not about a number, its about how you look and feel.
    1952 days ago
    It really is important and so good that you know it's not a small decision. It means that at a healthy weight, you know what it takes to lose and maintain at an even slightly different weight and that you took the time to share this is valuable for all of us who haven't even made it to goal. I hear over and over how maintenance is the hardest part and so I love to read blogs about it even though I'm not remotely close because it helps me prepare and even honor this process of losing. It. is. tough.
    Good for you for taking the time to do what is best for you. I hope you get well soon. emoticon
    1952 days ago
    It is hard to live an active real life and be active here on Sparks - I am in the same boat.
    I also seen my wife in your writing - she looses - and then gains it back - it has been two months of this so far - she is so discourage, especially since I am loosing constantly - but I am doing so much walking and exercising every day out side with the dog.
    I know you will succeed - enjoy your new lifestyle.
    1952 days ago
    Sorry to hear you have been sick and not able to reach your desired goal.

    It sound like a wonderful time to start journaling aside from spark to redefine your goals for the year. Having 2 little ones also need to be put into the equation so you don't overwhelm yourself with goals that are maybe too big and frustrate you instead of help you.

    Making a new start today with newly defined goals with realistic time sets and action plan wld help tremendously increase your effort. At times we shoot for things that may be at this time (with 2 little ones and life happening to us all the time) that we may need to cut into smaller chucks to handle. New healthy habits and goals are more achieveable when we don't overwhelm outselves.

    Today is the first day of the rest of your life so starting new for spring and handling with new goals and actions in baby steps might be just the trick.

    Good Luck on your Journey into the rebirth or spring season.

    Love Yvonne
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1952 days ago
    emoticon Epiphanies really can rock the way we live our lives.

    Amelia is beautiful with all that hair! My daughters both have very long hair--they started out with full heads of it. When my 3-year-old was littler, I tried to cut her some bangs, but the blades of the scissors just went around the hair, so I figured it wasn't meant to be. She still hasn't had it cut. The little one's hair is around her shoulders, and she'll be one next month. They'll have to shave it the following week, though... so she'll have hers cut before her older sister ever does!

    I am sure that whatever you decide to do, you can achieve.... just look where you are now!

    1952 days ago
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