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The Day I Had Been Dreading Has Arrived

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Today was the first day my Mother, who has Alzheimers, did not recognize me. I knew it was coming, braced myself for the eventuality, but it was still a sorrowful moment. The moment where there was no recognition, only fear and distrust in her eyes. She was distressed that this ' stranger' was following her around. The bright side was that I managed to look in her eyes and talk to her, eventually bringing her back to me, until she finally looked at me long and hard and said with discovery, " I see you now!". I am writing this in the dark, listening to her soft snores while she sleeps. I didn't eat a lot today but did finally have to raid the fridge at the memory care where she lives. I did not break down and take cakes, ice cream or cookies. I took a nice salad and some applesauce. I realized after a busy, emotional day with my Mom that the worst thing I could do today is not take care of myself.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    So sorry to hear. I know you knew this day was coming, but it is still one of the toughest things to face. Sending hugs and strength for you.
    1892 days ago
    I helped take care of an alzheimer woman for 3 years.
    She had moved in with her daughter and I took care of her while her daughter was at work.
    It was heart wrenching to see the pain the daughter was going through.
    My heart goes out to you! emoticon
    1893 days ago
    I work at an assisted living facility and I see this happen all of the time. My heart goes out to you. Take care. emoticon My boss always says that the heart always remembers even when the brain cannot!
    1897 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/13/2013 8:38:26 PM
    I know it's hard to go through it. emoticon
    1897 days ago
    My thoughts are with you as you take this journey. Be strong and keep the faith as that is what will carry you. You are remarkable to be there every step of the way for your Mom! These past three years have brought challenges in my own life as my mother had a stroke and has struggled to recover with the help of my Dad. I really feel for you and hope that you know that there are people who are pulling for you and truly care!
    1898 days ago
    I am so sorry about that. It is so good that she has you to take care of her and make sure she is safe, even if she doesn't always know who you are. Take good care of yourself, too; if you haven't done so yet, see if you can join a support group. Good luck!
    1898 days ago
    Your mom is very lucky to have you, and I'm sure she knows it deep down. Congrats on being strong and still taking care of yourself!

    1898 days ago
  • MARIANNE9855
    So sorry what a hard thing to go through emoticon
    1898 days ago
    That's gotta be tough, having a mom suffering from Alzheimers. Particularly, if you have had had a close relationship. Best wishes to you. Glenn
    1898 days ago
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