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The biggest girl in the gym

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

I don't know why they put mirrors in gyms and workout rooms. Seeing my fat ass try to burn it up on the elliptical does NOT encourage me. I feel like I am the biggest, fattest person in the gym and I'm definitely the largest girl in my Zumba class. My Zumba instructor said something last week about getting ready for bikini season. I laughed and told her I wasn't going to be bikini ready until next year.

I know I should be comparing my size to others but it's hard not to. The girls in my zumba class wear cute little belly dancing scarves with jingles on them and they are adorable. I got one and I can barely get it around my big butt. It's just not as cute on me as it is on them. They also wear adorable workout clothes that show off bare arms and midriffs. They are beautiful people. I'm in a dumpy T-shirt and sweatpants trying to hide my bulges.

The skinny girl inside of me is screaming to get out. She wants to look cute and perky too. She wants to be able to wrap her jingle skirt around her waste and wear adorable workout clothes without looking like a plump sausage ready to sizzle in the frying pan.

It's a catch 22. I won't become cute and skinny without working out but to work out I have to be the biggest girl in the gym for awhile. Pshaw... hopefully in six months or so I'll be down a dress size or two and the skinny girl inside of me will start to show her true colors. This time next year, I want the new girls to be jealous of me for a change.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    aww who cares what the girls look like in the gym.
    you are judging them for how they look, we all have insecurities and fear even those smaller than you. you are all there because you want to have fun and live a better life. remember that you love yorself enough to go, not the size or style or whatever of someone else. its nice to have smaller clothes and feel cute but being jealous of someone is not going to change when you loose weight, no matters how small you get you will find someone something to do that unless you change your insides as you change the outsides. the insides are what is most important. the outside is just what the world sees hun, the inside is what you live with. make it pretty and beautiful and accepting of who you are, at every size you are.
    because you deserve it.

    1921 days ago
    Bravest girl in the gym, for sure!
    1922 days ago
  • BETHS60
    There is a typo in your title. I think what you meant to say was that you are the BRAVEST girl in the gym.

    You go, girl!
    1922 days ago
    Keep up the great work. You are assuming that people at the gym are judging you. That may not be the case at all. I used to go to the gym and see this woman working out. She was much larger than me but she was consistently there and killing it every time. She worked out so much harder than me. I still regret that I never approached her and told her what an inspiration she was to me.

    emoticon emoticon
    1923 days ago
    Girl - it's not fat! It's POWER! You are rockin' it! Regardless of if you're the littlest lady OR the biggest lady in the gym... here's the thing... you're IN the GYM! No matter how big you are, you got off the couch and you took your butt to the gym. You are a rockstar!!

    I'm the biggest girl in my Zumba class, too. And I look ridiculous in the mirror. And I love it! Because I'm there. I'm brave enough to work my body and dance without caring what anyone else thinks.

    You are a beautiful woman and a power house! You have nothing to feel negative about.
    1923 days ago
  • NEWSGIRL2177
    OK, I totally hear you on the mirror and skinny minnies thing, but please don't let that consume your thoughts. Especially during Zumba! Those girls WISH they had some booty to shake!

    A good friend of mine trots into Zumba class every single time, determined to show the skinny minnies how a girl with curves can do it. I don't quite have that level of confidence, but I can tell you that she is having way more fun and burning way more calories than the girls in the tiny clothes, barely sweating.

    Keep moving, keep dancing and you'll be able to watch your own transformation in those giant mirrors.
    1923 days ago
    Go to class and look in the mirrors - I encourage you to do so!

    As we lose weight we tend to still think of ourselves as the "fat girl" or the "heaviest" - bottom line we don't see our progress!

    And as new people join the class - remember they are just as self conscious!

    Keep up the great work!

    1923 days ago
    I totally hear you but I swear you will come to love those mirrors! I still have 60-70 lbs to go, but in the last 40 lbs that I have lost I can see the difference in those mirrors when I am at Oula or bootcamp and it inspires me to keep going back and keep working at it! Soon enough you will be feeling better.. Dont worry about everyone else! Just keep focusing on you! You are awesome, strong and beautiful!
    1923 days ago
  • ADGRANT1021
    Way to go, just getting to the class. I was invited by a thinner and younger co worker to go to Zumba. I am afraid of hurting myself. I rented Zumba for the XBox. I just couldn't do it. I am working out to a video at home. I am so sore today after two days. Keep it up. Instead of looking at the reflection, try to see Skinny Tammy in a bright pink sports bra, low cut skin tight black pants with that scarf wrapped around you with lots of extra hanging down. She will be here when you are ready to see her. Keep it up. emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1923 days ago
    Every single other person there is criticizing themselves and not focusing on you. Negative self talk will not help you in any way. You are out there doing it. Period.

    I know how you feel about the mirrors and with time you will like what you see. Just keep at it like you said.
    1923 days ago
    I understand where you are coming from... It's hard to not compare but you have to be proud of yourself.... You decided to get out there and make a change find power in that. Look at yourself in the mirror and say good for me. I'm burning calories. Don't put yourself down. I think you are an inspiration! Not to just me but many of us who read this. You can do it.
    1923 days ago
    back when i went to the gym, i used to use the mirrors to check my form and make sure i was exercising properly. i guess i was so focused on doing what i needed to do to pay any attention to the other women in the exercise classes. it depends on what is important to you. that's where your focus will be.
    1923 days ago
    Oh my...your post sounds just like something I would say. You said something that I always say, "The skinny girl inside of me is screaming to get out.".

    But the reality is you are doing it. You are sucking it up and doing what you need to do. If it makes you feel any better, it is TOTAL motivation for me. If you are motivating me, I can guarantee you are doing the same for others on here.

    INPIRATIONAL if you ask me!!

    emoticon emoticon
    1923 days ago
    Believe me, I feel self-conscious too, but I know that I have to do this! Yes, people may look at you. But in 6 months when you are still there, they will look at you with admiration that you stuck it out! And not to mention, you will have dropped some pounds. You will be that skinny girl that you want to be!! Hang in there!!!! And congrats to you for having the courage to continue!
    1923 days ago
    I admire you for going to the gym at all! Don't be hard on yourself. You are way ahead of lots of us. There is a new gym opening not far from my home within a month or so. They sent out a mailing about joining for free with not contracts. I showed it to my adult son who is very fit (without even trying) but would love to join a gym too. The price is right for both of us but I am still very reluctant about joining, for all the reasons you mentioned. I belonged to a gym about 15 years ago when I was much thinner (but still overweight). I never got the great feeling people talk about from going to a gym, even then. But I am at least considering looking into the new gym. So you go girl and keep up the good work. You are an inspiration. emoticon
    1923 days ago
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