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Feb 2nd 2014 (a different mind set)

Saturday, February 02, 2013

Here I am in my 4th week and feeling good. While talking to my big sister yesterday I realised something. My outlook about this journey has changed. Althought I am keeping good track of my weight and goals and I have made myself accountable by posting all the stats at the end of each week, I noticed that I am not as tempted to climb on the scale between weight-ins. I also don't really expect anything from the weight-ins anymore.

What has changed?

I am not quite sure but I have some theory. I am going at this for the long term.

In 2011 I have proven to myself that I can lose 35 pounds relatively easily. I also have proven to myself I can set a goal and achieve it. I started the 5k my way walk/run training in April and successfully ran the 10km in Sept. All of that is fantastic and I am proud of it! really!

In 2012 I was ready to train and achieve another goal : to run a half-marathon and to run a Warrior Dash. Well that didn't quite happen. I found out in May I had something in my right breast, had surgery in August and radiation treatments in Nov. & Dec. Before I knew it was cancer, I totaly lost my motivation to run. It wasn't worth it because cancer or not, I would have to have surgery and I wouldn't be able to do the Dash in August or the half marathon in Sept.

This was my mistake. I had not really understood the reality of the quest. It wasn't important that I do the Dash or the half in 2012, it mattered that someday I would actualy be able to do them. I am don't feel remorse of any kind about that. I just know now that it is not because you can't do something today that you won't be able to do it in the future.

So this weight loss is something that will happen if I take the steps to get there. it will happen if I don't kick myself whenever life gets in the way. It will happen If I keep at it no matter what.

So I had given myself small goals. track food 2 days in the first week, keep in range (measured and tracked) once for the first week. Then I moved it up to tracking at least 3 days and staying in range 2. What did I do? I tracked 5 and stayed in range for 3. I was starting to really see how giving myself small attainable goals was making me do better. So, I started 2 streaks. Walking every day for at least 10 minutes (outside) and doing some other activity 3 times a week.

I am now done with my 10th day in a row walking, my 2nd week in a row doing something else at least 3 times and I have noticed I have been keeping in calorie range for th 4th day now. All of that without stressing about it. All of that because I want long term results and not instant gratification. It isn't worth it if I lose 30 or 40 pounds only to gain it back because I haven't really changed my ways. So I am keeping track of my streaks and I will for ever try to beat my best score no matter how long I am unable to keep a streak alive.

Funny. Now that I am not really focusing on the weight loss, I seem to have no problem respecting the calorie intake. So much so that this is the second day that I go and track my dinner to realise I am over 300 calories short of the minimum. So I end up making myself a toasted bagel with a tbs of cream cheese and half a tbs of Nutella!

As a gift to myself for having the streaks and not stressing about all of it, I have decided to get a hair cut and maybe have my nails done. I deserve it!
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