Cravings? What cravings?
Saturday, February 02, 2013
It's a blessing, really. I was afraid that when the anesthetics wore off (and I was warned by the surgeon that after 6 weeks I'd be back to 'normal'), my ocd would come back in full force.
I think I'm still compulsive about eating. I can polish off a box of Triscuits in a few minutes if I think about it.
The biggest change is that I don't crave my old comfort foods of the recent past. Mac 'n' cheese, pizza, lasagna... I can't have these anymore, so I have pretty much put them out of sight and out of mind. I haven't craved desserts, even, or sweets in general. I have preserves and make sandwiches with almond butter and preserves, but that's all for the sweet bits thus far.
It's not a brag, but an observation.
The down side is that I have to feel my feelings now, good and bad. I've become snappish, irritable, impatient. Small things set off my anger, and once that anger monster shows up, it's impossible to put it back into hiding.
The weight is still coming off. I am losing about a pound every two weeks, which is alright with me. it's the only sign I have that my diet has improved, that I'm still able to maintain a low-fat, non-dairy lifestyle. I haven't been pro-active in lowering my refined carb intake, but little by little I'm making adjustments and in the end, it will be a life I can live without complaints or longing for that greener grass over there. Sure, I see ads for restaurants and wish I could order me some of that when I go there, look at yummy crap on the store shelves and get a bit wistful for a moment, but it stops there so far.
It takes being very sick, sometimes, to propel a body to accept what is, and work with the rest.