What was I thinking?

Friday, February 01, 2013

This has been an off sort of day. I went to a hair appointment, which I normally really enjoy. It wasn't that I had a bad time, it just felt kind of ... flat. I'm not sure I love my hair style either. I give my stylist freedom to do whatever she wants.. well, within reason. I'm usually thrilled. I asked her to go a bit more conservative because I am thinking that I want to get a part time job while I attend the hypnotherapy institute. Oh yes, I decided to take at least the first course and see how that goes. Anyway, this style is rather different... kind of sleek. I don't know. With a big body like mine I sort of prefer 'bigger hair' to balance myself out. We shall see.

I stopped at the drugstore with the explicit purpose of buying some fire engine red nail polish. No, I don't wear polish. The hummingbirds don't love our new feeder. Hubby says it is because it is blue, so I was going to paint the flowers a bright red, in the hopes they would start to feed from it. I unloaded the polish, and a few other items I purchased. Then I warmed up some left over lentils and rice for lunch. I was really really hungry.

I decided to lace up my shoes and walk to the vet to pick up some cans of food for my cat. I googled the distance - only .6 miles. Just before I walked out, I realized the mail had already run and I had bills that needed posted, and I needed to pay the water bill. I reasoned that I could do a big loop, going 2 blocks behind the vet to the water company, then another couple of blocks up to the post office, and finally loop around to the vet.
About the time I got to the post office I realized that I haven't walked this far in a while. It was dreadful. I used to do this walk with ease and actually liked it. I also wore running shoes instead of walking shoes and they were so stiff that my feet began to ache only a couple of blocks in. By the time I got the pet food, I was having to psych myself up. The last few blocks I was saying to myself with each step, "one, two, one, two, one two", just to keep going. Why did I AGAIN forget to factor in the weight of 10 cans of pet food? Ok it wasn't horribly heavy, but it was one more thing. Like a crazy person, I'm listening to a book on my iPod about a woman hiking the Pacific Coast Trail in boots that are too small so they are tearing up her feet. Yea. Not motivational.

Here's what I decided. Every time I go for a walk, I'm weight lifting!
Seriously. I've gained back like 50 pounds in the last few years. Of COURSE it hurts. I'm my old self, with a 50 lb barbell strapped on my back. OWWWWWW. This is why I've been putting this off. I knew it was going to hurt because it hurt last time when I first got started. I had hoped, rather unrealistically, that I had retained... some fitness. Not so much.

Then, I get home, sweaty and plop on the couch to chug some water. Once recovered, I decided to surprise my husband by working on that bird feeder. Perched on a step stool, I unhook the chain it is attached to and bring it in the house. I tape up all the little feed holes, set the antique bottle feeder on newspaper on the counter, and turn to get the nail polish. I left it on the bar, next to my husband's new mouth guard. But... it wasn't there. Oh, come on .. it has to be there. That's where I left it. I could see it in my mind's eye. Two hours later, on my sore feet, I've combed every room of the house, reopened the CVS bag 3 times, looked through my car and (a bonus) picked up every horizontal surface in my house. I just plopped back on the couch. Ticked off.

Hubby came home and he shared about the nightmare traffic on his commute home from San Francisco. I tell him about my walk and losing the nail polish. He decides to help me look, but first he decides to feed the cats. He stoops to the cupboard below the bar and starts laughing riotously. He motions me over. Right next to the neatly stacked rows of cans sits a bright red bottle of Confetti "The Red Carpet" nail polish.
But... you know what? I took the walk no matter what. And, even when I was frustrated beyond all get out and searching, and I didn't dive into a bag of chips. In fact, just before hubby came home, I put my iPod on and played one of the quick trance sessions. It probably kept me from throwing the bird feeder through the window. *laughing*

Oh ... one more thing. When I was on the final stretch home, I was walking in the bike lane, facing traffic, having stepped off the sidewalk because a cyclist (who should have been in the street) was barreling towards me. My glasses slipped but it looked like he was carrying something. As he got closer, I noticed he was adolescent, rather grungy with a baseball cap on. He wasn't carrying anything. He was scowling and flipping me off. Usually that would have totally ticked me off. I don't know if it was because this incident was so similar to the one I told the hypnotherapist about, or if I was just so aware of my aching feet that I couldn't care less, but...*shrug* I just thought, "I wonder what is making that kid so angry?" and went on my way. It is only now, in retrospect, that I sort of wish I had clotheslined him... ok that's bad. Its a good thing that is only in my head, right?
Tomorrow I have two food related events. In the morning an former co-worker from the Department of Education is taking me to breakfast at a little greasy spoon diner. I'm not sure how I will handle that, but I'm sure there is something there I can eat. Then, I'm meeting with a friend for lunch who wants to talk about grad school options and she is really interested in the training I signed up for. That one won't be hard. She works downtown and there are tons of healthy options there. I love how my life is rarely balanced - I'm either a hermit or I am barely home. *lol*
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Goood job on the walk..and what fun on the nail polish search...I can't tell you HOW many times I'm scurrying around looking for something I just HAD in my hands two minutes before...might be a syndrome of "too much stuff!" emoticon emoticon
    1933 days ago
    I'm always afraid to do anything different with my hair as it is fine and straight and it looks the best the way it is. I get helmet head easily.

    I'm out of shape too and have to get my stamina back when I recover.

    I also have been misplacing things and get irritated. Wonder what is going on.
    1967 days ago
  • LKG9999
    So this blog reminds me of the realities of living a healthy lifestyle. I know on Sparkpeople we're usually here to be upbeat and cheer each other on, but the reality is there are great, inspiring days and then ones that simply - well, stink. I think the challenge is to not get bogged down in the bad days, or turn them into the new reality, e.g."*every* walk is going to be hard". I promise you, keep walking (in shoes that don't hurt!) and it *will* get easier. And for those days that it's hard, keep on keepin' on, and let us keep cheering you on.

    emoticon emoticon
    1967 days ago
    My, my! What a day!! I had to chuckle at all of the walking and then having to carry home cans of pet food!!! I'm glad you've decided to follow through with the training. Sounds like something you would enjoy and would be good at! When do you start?
    PS. I'm losing stuff all the time!!! I so relate to nail polish!! I drive myself crazy!! It seems hubby and I are always looking for something!! LOL
    1967 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/2/2013 8:45:46 AM
    Hello Beautiful!
    What a day! I am so proud of you, I know it hurts and how is it that we lose our fitness so dang fast???! I just started T-Tapping again and I'm pretty sure I completed a boot camp last month but after my pensive break it is just as hard as ever.. emoticon
    No joke, I got a haircut last week when my husband got one. I can't afford my girl anymore so I just plopped into a chair at his place. I hate it. Today I was so witchy because I can no longer pretend it just needs to be styled, it sucks. emoticon
    You rock for going out and doing it no matter what! What up with all the haters around??? A few years ago I talked myself into walking to the church where I was teaching a class. I cut through the park and I was feeling good, had worked up a sweat. A man sitting on the bench asked me, "Did you do that?" I was like what? He repeated himself and at this point I was all smiles and looking at my shirt thinking I had a stain or something and he looked me straight in the eye and said, "Did you really eat your children?" I was so creeped out and then really hurt. It was his sick way of calling me fat. People can be so awful that's why we come here emoticon
    Good luck this weekend. I am a bit nervous about super bowl.....
    1968 days ago
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