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Sour Pusses, Be Gone!

Monday, January 28, 2013

I can control you. You can control me. You can be a stranger. You can be a good friend or family too. Did you know we have this impact on each other? I’m sure you do, at least to some extent. It took well into adulthood before I knew.

Clerks and others did not treat me very well. Once I asked a friend what to do about it. I assumed I would get some sympathy about ‘those’ people. Instead, she told me that nine times out of ten, it was my fault. Well, that isn’t exactly how she put it. That’s how I took it.

What she meant is that when I approached people expecting bad service or expecting to be ignored, that is exactly what I would get. “The world is a mirror.” my more evolved husband says.

Your mood impacts others. That is where the expression, “You can catch more flies with honey…” comes from. If you approach someone yelling and screaming, guess how they are going to reply? Ok, well you knew that. It also applies to more subtle dispositions. If you are friendly and upbeat, you will get it back. This concept is called mirroring. My husband didn’t even study communications or psychology and he knew that!

Do some field experiments at your local mall and see mirroring in its natural habitat. You might notice that people engaged in conversation often hold similar poses. They mimic each other’s gestures, facial expressions, and word choice too. They do it subconsciously.

Now, when I encounter the gruff individual that doesn’t respond to a smiley face, I know for sure, it’s them, not me. There are some people that refuse to engage in positive behaviors. Oh well, their loss. Now, I know better.

That is the big lesson I’ve learned that I wish I knew when I was younger. I wish I had spent more of my life with a happy expression than with a sour puss. Then, I would have seen a lot less sour pusses in return.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    People often tell me I look grumpy- it's just the way I hold my face. So when I remember I try to lighten up my expression. I've never thought about actually doing an experiment tho. Tomorrow I have errands- I'll put on a happy face and see what happens!!!!!

    1798 days ago
  • TERRYT55
    What an excellent blog. I notice when people don't respond to me with smiles I am the one to blame. Treat people as you want to be treated and you'll be rewarded! Thanks for the reminder.
    1936 days ago
    That's true. I'm a smiley face almost all of the time, even when I don't realize I'm smiling, people smile back at me. It's kind of funny sometimes - I look in a window or mirror to see if I'm really smiling and I am. Those sad souls that try to bring us down are pitiful and you are right, "their loss."

    Great blog, have a wonderful day. emoticon
    1939 days ago
    So true! And so good to be reminded of!
    1940 days ago
    Haha, my momma always said, "Put a smile on your face and people will smile back." It's weirdly true.
    1940 days ago
    Awesome!!! Even when stressed out, I'll try to smile more and maybe more things will be pleasant!!! emoticon
    1941 days ago
    Totally agree. Great lesson!
    1942 days ago
    Maybe that's why I withdraw when I'm in a bad mood. I don't want to be that sourpuss, so I'd rather avoid than yell at people. Good lesson...
    1942 days ago
    Great lesson. Thanks
    1942 days ago
    A good lesson learned, Goriana! My little sister used to make a game of trying to get sourpusses to smile -- and, she usually succeeded! emoticon
    1942 days ago
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