LADYPYE

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Reality Check

Sunday, January 27, 2013

I am ashamed of my weight and how it affects my family and my selfesteem. Where do I start? I feel lost and confused as to what to do next.

Baby steps to start but I want to run and take off. Have a quick fix even though I know it will take time.

Going to work on the emotions. Maybe that will jumpstart the rest.

I do appreciate all the motivational blogs, comments and other articles that help keep me afloat. I have found though, I am better helping others than I am me.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 1STATEOFDENIAL
    You say you're better at helping others. Have you tried to step back and get a wide view on your life? If you had a friend saying/doing what you are, facing the same challenges, what would you say to them? Try for straight honesty. Write it down then walk away for a little while. Come back to it later and read what you wrote. How can you implement that advice?

    As for the kids, the more you teach them now about independence the better off they will be as adults (the 20 yo should be able to take care of him/herself by now). Set up chores, give each specific jobs to do, and teach them. The first few times you help them through their jobs will take up more time for you, but in the long run it will save you a ton of time! They'll also be learning extremely valuable life skills that will help in every aspect of their lives: not only taking care of themselves and their future families, but also about working in the real world and interacting with people who expect things from them. (Believe it or not, teaching a kid how to not turn the whites into pinks can help teach them lots of skills like following directions, paying attention, care and concern for other's objects, etc.)

    As for your own journey, the 'quick fix' is never an option. Even if you were to shed the weight overnight and be at goal weight tomorrow, you still have to maintain it for the rest of your life. The healthy journey is never over, even if the weight loss is done. If you can figure out how to accept this as your new normal, it may be easier to take. Then start on the tiny little changes: a little extra movement, simple changes to your food intake, and learning more about the emotional and mental health side of changing your life. When you've maintained a new habit for a few weeks then choose another to tackle. You'll get to goal eventually, but doing it slowly can actually help you feel like you're not really changing anything while you are making an impact.
    1968 days ago
  • ALWAYSROSY
    ((((((( Ladypye ))))))))

    I think you've spoken for a LOT of us! It is very helpful to me to treat myself as though I have already reached goal. Treating my body like it is already thin and lovely. Having respect for myself helps me treat me better.

    We are right here walking the journey along side you! emoticon

    Spark on!
    1968 days ago
  • LADYPYE
    Thank you both for your words of encouragement. I have a planner that I keep appointments in so that may be the answer. Finding me time is hard with the amount of people that are here in my home. I can't kick them out, they are my kids. I have talked with them about some me time. They are 12, 14, 17 and 20. I instructed them that there are things that they can do for themselves. That they need to become a little more independent.

    Guess you could say that I am weaning them. LOL

    emoticon
    1968 days ago
  • DIANE7786
    What works for me is treating food and exercise as if it's part of my job. I'd never tell my boss that I'm too busy, too tired, going home to watch TV, or just don't feel like working! I enter everything in my planner. I don't take phone calls or allow other distractions. Seeing that I make my grocery list on Thurs at 7 p.m, Shop on Friday at 5:30, cook for the week on Sat morning and exercise at 5:30 and on my breaks makes these tasks seem less overwhelming. Cooking on Sat means the kitchen is a mess once a week. Meals are on the table in less than 15 mins and snacks are ready to eat. It makes my life seem so much simpler.
    1968 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/27/2013 6:30:44 AM
  • LILYBELLE12
    I think sometimes it is harder to take care of ourselves than to care for others, but it is so important that we do. I have been trying very hard lately to allow myself "me time" to do something for me and only me. I also have been working on visualization more too, I really think that helps me stay more focused. I have found a lot of help on this site in the few short weeks (only 4 weeks) since I started my journey. I know you will too!
    emoticon
    1968 days ago
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