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My body image.

Friday, January 25, 2013

So I guess in order to change the way I think about my body I kinda have to know what it is that I think in the first place and why I think that way.

So I'll start off with what I think is sexy, beautiful. I admire the 50/60's vintage pin ups. Marylin Monroe would be my body role model. She wasn't stick thin at all, she had curves. I don't want to be stick thin, I want to be strong and have curves, I am a woman after all.

Last night I did something I have never really done before, I took a bath, lit some candles put some baby oil in the water and just looked at my body. I'm totally the type that changes as fast as I can and will avoid the mirror until I have clothes on. No wonder why I have such a poor opinion of my body, I don't really even know what it looks like.

So I was thinking about what I truly think of my body and this is what I came up with:

I actually love my feet, I've always been told my feet were weird because my toes curl under. I like that my toes curl under. My feet are a size 8, I believe that's average but I get told I have small feet a lot. I especially love my feet after a pedicure, my toe nails are really tiny and I can't paint them myself. I'm starting to like my legs. I used to hate them, always thought my thighs were too fat but now I'm starting to like the extra fat on my thighs. I do miss the muscles of my calves but I'll get that back in time. I also used to hate my legs because my skin is super sensitive and I would itch them till they would bleed. I've cut back on the amount of chemicals I use which has solved the problem. I don't like my stretch marks on my thighs but that's not something I can change, so I need to accept them, and maybe at some point love them because they are "scars" from the journey I went through. I do wish my hips were bigger but it's not something that bothers me. I have no qualms over my butt, always, always been told how nice it is, lol. My stomach has probably given me the most grief. One I have a trial of hair going down the middle which has always made me self conscious. I have always carried a little extra weight around my stomach. Well I'm learning that's because it's my body's way of saying I'm stressed. It's slowly going away. I have a bit of a muffin top going on, but it's starting to bother me less and less. I'm starting to like my curves. I have always wished my boobs were a bit bigger, that hasn't changed. I used to love my arms, I don't so much anymore because they aren't as strong as they used to be. I love my hands, they are my mother's hand. I have long slender fingers. I used to hate my nose I thought it was too pointed. I do hate the bags under my eyes that never seem to go away.

I am a "dirty" italian. Which means I have fair skin, and dark thick hair. I don't mind my dark thick hair well except for the places other than my head. I'm slowly getting over that too. I don't think I'm ugly. I do think I am beautiful, but I would never boast about it. It's funny because typing this out seems soo silly. Saying all my insecurities out loud.

I do think the human body is beautiful. I think skin looks breath taking under candlelight.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    FYI: I've looked at your pics and thought how pretty you are :) But I know what you mean. I am trying to get more comfortable in my skin as well. Thinking about trying to find pictures of "real" women online and putting them up somewhere.
    1912 days ago
    you gotta start believing in yourself more!
    1913 days ago
    Beaty is in the eyes of the beholder. As long as you think you are beautiful that is all that matters.
    1913 days ago
    I think you are a classic beauty. Vibrant and embracing your flaws. They are not bad,and fixable. It is good to start to feel comfortable in your own skin.
    1913 days ago
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