As Tears Roll Down My Face
Thursday, January 17, 2013
I must first start off by saying my hunni loves me very much this I know.......but at 4am he comes home from work waking me with "baby I got something for you," I turn over groggy cuz I must wake in a couple of hours for the gym(he knows this) and to my surprise
he hands me a Hot to go container from Denny's.....now I am sure you see the look on my face
.....so I say as nicely as I can muster up"What is this?"! He says baby I know you haven't been eating much lately so I brought you one of your favorites......keep in mind I have not opened the box.....and I say "hunni I am not hungry I am going to the gym shortly.......he says I know but just look inside its healthy for you." So I do...... its a LOADED grilled chicken bowl! Now for those of.you who don't know what that is its an order of grill chicken LOADED with cheese and more cheese and potatos and exactly 4. I say again 4 broccoli spears! Now friends on the inside I am literally screaming WTF! On the outside tears are rolling down my face......how in the world could this man say he loves me and I am 300plus pounds struggling everyday to love myself.....I know he does but why can't he understand how unhappy I am this way. He believed the dish was healthy cuz it had grilled chicken and 4 broccoli spears.....my tears turn to laughter cuz he really don't know any better and his heart isin the right place.....I have my work cut out for me!!!! Needless to say I didn't eat no parts of that.......I got up on time and hit the gym with my trainer proud of myself that I didn't cave in nor did I sleep in....instead I made a better choice thats what this journey is about making better choices!