I've missed my Sparkfriends terribly! I literally have no time to myself anymore. It gets tougher and tougher as the days pass and the kids grow. Being a mom is never dull, that's for sure.
True, I have taken a bit of a step back from SP. I've had to. It has been hard to stay away, but I have needed some time to truly assess things and make some decisions based on what I want versus reading about everyone's resolutions and goals for weight loss. I tend to get wrapped up in that and that isn't what I want.
I've been working out. Hard.
I am back with ChaLEAN Extreme which is hands down my favorite workout program that I have ever done. I am learning more about myself as I go along and my workout style has changed, I have gone away from a lot of the cardio type workouts and my focus has shifted to mainly strength training and yoga. The cardio workouts I am doing are interval-type of workouts. Steady state cardio is about the most boring thing to me.
I am back to using my Fitbook and am in week three of it. I love this book because it allows me to track what I am eating but minus the crazy-obsessiveness and constant redundancy of counting calories. Boo. I would be perfectly happy to never count a single calorie again. Ever.
Recently, my main goal in life is to simply maintain my sanity, which at times seems an undertaking in futility. Four kids and the craziness of everyday life with them and added on top of that all are my grandparents, who have been fairly high maintenance as well. I spend a lot of my time running around for them, signing paperwork for my grandma and trying to keep the rest of the family up on how things are with them. I love them dearly and love having them here, but my stress levels are through the roof. Presently, my grandma is in the hospital and seems to be slipping deeper into her dimentia which is excruciating to watch. I miss my grandma more than anyone can or will ever know.
My baby, who will be 18 months (OMG how time flies!!) soon is not a good sleeper and will not consistently sleep through the night for me and yes, I've tried just about EVERYthing from the CIO method to binkies to Ferber and nothing works. Exhaustion is my middle name and me and sleep deprivation do not cooperate well together. He goes down to bed very good, we have the nighttime routine solidified from baths to jammies to stories to night-nights to everyone he goes down stellar. But he seems to be lacking in the department of getting himself back to sleep when he wakes up. I know it won't last forever, but until then, it only compounds the stress and more difficult parts of my life.
Me time happens in very small, small chunks. I would desperately love to get out of the house with other adults. I have pretty much no friends who share my lifestyle so I don't really have anyone to relate to. I have considered going back to the Y (which offers a childcare center) just to get me out of the house and around other like-minded people so I can workout (I so so miss spinning!!!), but at the moment, I just don't know if I can justify the cost. But the possibility is there and I am working up to it.
I have been back on the scale, I will admit it. I have managed to maintain my weight from the time I ditched the scale back in October when I came back to intuitive eating, which is nice to see. I can honestly say that I have no scale goals. My goals at the moment are to just work on getting stronger. When I finish up the 12 weeks of ChalEAN and my Fitbook, I am considering going with The New Rules of Lifting for Women but want some more info about it (feel free to jump in if you have it!) and am wondering if it is conducive to home workouts or if it is aligned more for gym type equipment.
Maybe that is what I will do for my reward for competing ChaLEAN -- rejoin the gym and use this book. Input welcome!!
So, that's what I am up to. I am here on SP, but more lurking. NOt really participating in team threads but rather just focusing on my goals and how I can completely rock 2013 and make it a much better year.
I will make more of a point to come in to SP and say hi. I hope everyone is doing well!!