What Do I Deserve?
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Yesterday I had a mentally exhausting day at work. By the time I finally escaped to my car I was wiped out, hungry and feeling sorry for myself. I had to stop at another store on the way home, and of course I was shopping hungry and didn't have a healthy snack with me. I did, however, have in my bag a cute little baggie of gold-wrapped chocolate coins that a co-worker gave me since I worked through our holiday party.
I deserved a treat. Right?
I thought about eating the chocolate in the car during my commute home. I could imagine it clearly. Fumbling with the wrapper as I drive, crumbs of mediocre chocolate everywhere. Yum! So I put on an audio book instead, and imagined the next number I'd see on the scale.
Then I went shopping, still very hungry, but I felt elated over my minor victory and that helped a lot. So the treat I got myself was a containers of gorgeous ripe tomatoes.
I totally deserved that treat!
So what do we do after a lifetime of treats as rewards? Great report card? Ice cream! Gold fish died? Let's make brownies. And so on. How do we stop? How do we change the mindset? Practice makes perfect? Is it as simple as that? No, I didn't say easy. That it is not.
I deserve to be healthy. I deserve to be thin and lovely and proud of myself. But I still deserve a treat, don't I?