Steadily going down...183

Saturday, January 12, 2013

When I stepped on my scale, I don't have a digital, I saw 160 peeking around the corner. I could see myself there already. I think one of the best things for me is looking forward, no matter how delusional I sound. I already see myself hitting 179, the only question is when. I bought 2 pairs of size 14 curvy pants and they are too loose. Due to my thunder thighs, I have to buy curvy pants, so I wonder if I buy a size 12, if I am really a size 12 or if it's considered 12W... it doesn't matter as long as the pants fit I guess.

I feel really positive, but I am already worried about what happens next. What happens when I reach my goal guys? I have come a long way from 240, and I am currently rounding 2nd base. I won't be able to blame my weight for things once I lose it and that worries me. Will I have to be who I've always wanted to be, or will that idea change. Will I have to be a go getter or can I still laze around on weekends and take naps. Will I have to wear fashionable clothes or can I still wear my comfy sneaks on my commute. Do I have to be a biatch at work, or can I be unassuming and polite to my patients and staff (I got the greatest compliment today btw, it was awesome).

I was having a discussion on whether it is better to exercise and initiate weight loss program first, or if you should get your mind right first. I was on the side of getting your sneaks and running out the door. I now get what the other person was saying. I am not doing this to get healthy. I am overweight, but I haven't had any health scares, etc. This is purely for aesthetic and social reasons, which I believe is enough to get you out the door, but how do you stay there? I've gotten to 160 in 2006 before I dropped the ball, got depressed and gained it all back and then some. I know that I am in a better place mentally for sure, I have a job that I like, a good support system, friends and a therapist. BUT I don't want to repeat history. Depression is a serious issue, and sometimes you don't even realize you are there until it's too late

I'm going back to bed now. My plan is to wake up whenever, go for a walk/jog- I"m in week 2 of couch to 5K- plan my budget and go on my last "shopping spree" at target before I start this spending fast. Thanks for reading have a good day
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Congrats on all your success so far, and best of luck as you continue!

    Thinking about maintenance can be scary at times- so many people gain weight back after they work so hard to lose it. Thankfully, Spark people has a lot of resources- including articles and teams for people maintaining their new life.

    What will happen when you reach your goal? Only time will tell. But you are making amazing progress, and you will find a way to keep going!!
    1960 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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