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Too tired to be sad.

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

For the first time in a long time, I took a sleep aid (excedrine PM) to go to sleep last night. I woke up with some RENEWED energy and my head felt CLEAR again. I must not have had a good night's sleep in awhile. Its not something I want to do all the time but I think I needed it.

I got home and was suprised to find out I will be having 7 kids over friday for Cameron's birthday instead of the 2-3 originally planned. Cameron often goes behind my back and has discussions with his father. In fact, the last time he was grounded was because of it. However, I can't 100% fault Cameron, because Randy continually allows it as well. Its exhausting. I know they are both probably sick of hearing me get mad about it, just as much as I am sick of telling them that they shouldn't be doing it.

I told Randy that I thought it was disrespectful of Cameron, and his way to get around what I say. I also said that it shows me that he (randy) is inconsiderate of my feelings considering how often I tell them how it hurts my feelings that they have these conversations and don't include me, when I am always the one watching the kids and feeding them.

I probably shouldn't be writing about him since he joined spark lol but he doesn't read my blogs any ways.

I cried...I am sick of always feeling blindsided and not having my feelings considered.

Then I decided to get over it and get on the treadmill and do some strength training. Had a good work out but didn't do any studying. Good things tomorrow is my (semi) day off.

Any ways, now I am too tired to care that they don't care about my feelings...(sounds sad doesn't it?) But I have also decided to leave Randy with the 7 kids (plus Cameron) friday and go out with friends. Guess he can figure out how to feed them all and deal with it.
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    emoticon emoticon
    1932 days ago
    emoticon Ok Push-Up Girl (wink, wink) my husband's name is Randy too. That's funny...

    Way to cope with your emotions in a healthy way emoticon

    And... I LOVE that you will leave him with the kids. Perfect!!!

    Hope you get a good night's rest and feel refreshed and rejuvenated tomorrow.

    1933 days ago
  • -AMANDA79-
    Ugh. I'm sorry.

    1933 days ago
    LOL good idea !!! he agreed to them all, let him realize the difference. Also can I just suggest that if the feeling as if you don't count or whatever, happens enough, please deal with it before you end up holding in stuff that you shouldn't and also ........ before you get married. Harder the longer you put up with it, believe me, I felt as if I was walking on eggshells for long time, we both ended up agreeing to councelling mainly cos of his depression but still for other stuff too.
    HUGS and hope i am making too big a thing of it! don't want you sad.

    1933 days ago
    So sorry you are going through it. I am going through a similar situation between my husband & my son. Husband is always bitching about the finances & that Randy needs to get a job. He has been looking be he has a felony on his record from 6 years ago & keeps getting turned down. I hate being stuck in the middle! Way to go on leaving Randy to deal with the kids! That sounds like a great plan!
    emoticon emoticon
    1933 days ago
    OOOPS. That will be interesting!
    1933 days ago
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