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7 day blog challenge: Energy

Saturday, January 05, 2013

Leaping off of my SparkSister DogLady13's idea (she does a lovely intro)

First Question:
What has given you or depleted energy from you this year?

One year ago I decided that the key for me finally losing the weight was to start tracking calories. I had lost my job in June 2010, decided this was the impetus to finally "Lose the Baby Weight!" - Nov 2010 I weighed in at an astonishing 197 lbs. Thanks to the support and encouragement of my SparkFriends, I'm now a much more manageable 156.

I gain energy from the people around me. The people around me also deplete me. You dont realize how much until you spend time around such a relentlessly positive group like SparkPeople. When you need energy, you post a blog, a question in the forums, I've even gotten emails from people when I put a sad little blurb on a Team Huddle. And we all pay it back in Spades when we have extra. We encourage each other and the group dynamic makes it possible for us to succeed as individuals.

On a more personal level, my brief stint this fall, refueled my desire, my love of teaching. When I lost my job, I lost my identity. Where most people have confidence and self worth, I was plagued with doubt. I would drop Child off at preSchool, sit on the sofa for 3 hours and cry, then scrape myself back together and go pick him up. Although the teaching assignment was temporary and flippin' FAR to commute, it refilled my confidence that I can do it, I'm not a terrible teacher and person.

Depleted: well, when you finish your first Triathlon in the freezing rain, charging up that hill and there is nothing NOTHING left in your gas tank. Then you are depleted. But go to the diner and eat Pork Souvlaki WITH the french fries. Do your first Brick workout. Then you are depleted. Break something: I've done ribs and fractured my elbow. The pursuit of endurance sports has taught me in a more viceral way than any other lesson that I should measure my best against my own best and not any others. I'm 38 yr old woman, not a 19 yr old boy. I will never be able to complete a triathlon in 56 minutes. Just not gonna happen! But I can do better than I did last time. I can set new goals for myself and be satisfied with my own performance. I can inspire the people around me. I can lead by example.

Let that be good enough.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    This is a great post. I think a lot of people hold themselves to the standards of others, and that's why we "think" we fail miserably.
    1927 days ago
  • MARTY728
    emoticon Sorry about the teaching situation. emoticon
    1930 days ago
    Good blog! emoticon
    1931 days ago
    You are definitely an inspiration to me!
    1931 days ago
    You are awesome! This is a fantastic blog. Thank you so much for sharing.
    1931 days ago
    "relentlessly positive" - excellent description of SparkPeople. There were plenty of times when I didn't have much to give, but someone else was down deeper in the "I can't do this" hole than I was. I'd give the little bit I had and found that some how my positive energy multiplied.

    I'm not sure how to help re teaching. I guess I can't other than to send positive, loving karma in your direction.
    1931 days ago
    Teaching is such a wonderful, unique profession. Every teacher I have ever met (myself included), has defined themselves by their calling. Even when they are not actively teacher. It is an integral part of who you are.

    As Missifish said...you are more than good enough. You are amazing. A big part of that "relentlessly positive" group. And you are a better, stronger version of yourself every day. You continue to challenge and inspire yourself, and that challenges and inspires everyone around you.

    Oh. And I didn't realize how much I looked forward to responses to my blogs and posts and comments until you mentioned it. I smile every time my email goes off, telling me that someone has cared enough to reach out and connect. It's a beautiful thing.
    1931 days ago
    So many good points here! I totally agree about the Spark community... it's a huge energy pool where we take some when we seek it, and give it back when we have it... in the form of shared enthusiasm for things that are important to us!

    But the best thing is the realism in measuring our progress: against ourselves, not others. I may laugh that it made me feel "old" when the 22 year olds called me "an inspiration" toward the end of my first triathlon, reading the "59" on my right calf. But it also made me feel good.

    Well written and well thought out! emoticon
    1931 days ago
    You are more than good enough!!! I'm so sorry about all the yuck related to the lack of teaching. I went through a similar thing too, when I decided to stay home as a full time parent. What worked for me was doing the part time thing while they were little, and now I'm back to teaching full time. You'll figure out what works for you, too.

    I wish you all the best and many days where you earn your souvlaki and french fries without gaining an ounce!
    1932 days ago
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