What the heck?!?

Saturday, January 05, 2013

I'm getting frustrated with myself....I set off to be healthy. I know all the consequences of being obese. I want to be happy with myself. I'm doing this for me and no one else.

I'm very thankful that my wonderful boyfriend is also committed to getting in better shape, too. He is eating healthy most of the time and works out almost daily. Once I have some more money to work with, I will be joining the gym again.

I can't wait to be healthy. I know it will have a tremendous effect on my now daily battle with depression. It's hard to enjoy life when there are so many things negative in it. However, I have hope for a better me. I know I've tried several different things throughout the years to lose weight but what I have come to realize that I must get on a routine and be strict. Not because I want to torture myself but because my longing desire to have spontaneity has not led to healthy me. I have fought so hard against routine in fear that I would become another boring adult who just works and goes home. So I "treat" myself to a snack here or a McDouble there. Or, hey, I dealt with a lot today so I'm going to get a Sonic Blast. Never realizing that those things have an entire day's worth of calories in a small cup! Yikes.

Using has been eye-opening.

For about a month I have been trying new WW recipes building a nice selection of foods to choose from. My first goal is to go from obese to overweight. For me that means dropping to 179. According to a few different "simulators" that could be accomplished by April 13.

I can say it is motivating to know Brad is working out daily because I kind of want to out-do him with this weight loss. Competition=motivation. Plus I can't wait to see how we look! And I'm sure the sex will improve, too! (not that it's lacking now but you know....)

I know all of this. I am motivated.

It's execution that I cannot get a grip on. I have every thing planned out so that I can't say "I dont' know what's for dinner" and end up making a bad decision. I have a freezer full of healthy food prepared and all I have to do is grab it before I leave for work. And yet, I don't.

How do I get on a schedule? And make it stick?

Why do I keep self-sabotaging?
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    1917 days ago
  • SNS1968
    emoticon emoticon
    1930 days ago
    I really know how you feel! I have self sabotage times biggest is evening meals, after I've eaten well all day, and then can't seem to get enough the saltier choices. I am actually staying in calorie range, but I KNOW I am not eating well.

    Anyway, a few things that helped me get away from my worst triggers - McDonalds, Potato Chips and a nice glass or two of Vino....

    I look up calories for restaurants BEFORE I go. It is incredible what the calorie counts are. I used to eat 2 sausage biscuits on the way to work every day and be hungry a few hours later. 860 calories. And since eating one makes me want more, I had to just cut McDonalds out completely. I know some people say 'everything in moderation', but for me, some foods have to be completely out of my diet, because they send me down the slippery slope. So that was out, breakfast cereal was in, and I find it keeps me fuller longer. We eat out a lot, so I am looking up calories early in the day and planning ahead. So look up those calories before you spend the $$$ on a food or treat you will regret later.

    Potato Chips: Absolutely out of the picture. I'd eat a lot (comfort eating) and then feel like sh&t - physically and emotionally. I do not keep them in the house at all. And when I am tempted - I try to take 2 minutes to remember how I feel after I eat them, which is sluggish, a little sick and unmotivated. I drink water, walk away. So far, I am "clean" for about 80 days. So- try to think about how you feel AFTER you eat something that's not on the plan, before you actually eat it. Take a few minutes, walk away, drink some water, then make your choice.

    Move-Take a walk, dance around, do WII, clean house, go shopping (mall walking=activity)....stay occupied. My biggest enemy is boredom. And inactivity breeds inactivity, while activity makes you feel healthier and want to move more.

    And what the other ladies said - one meal at a time, one day at a time. Track all your food, be happy in your accomplishments (You ARE planning, your mind set is there...those are good things). This won't happen overnight. And if your boyfriend is anything like my DH, the weight will seem to melt off him while I cut back more, exercise more and lose more slowly- frustrating! So don't measure you success based on who is losing more. Measure it by how YOU feel. That's the key.

    Hang in there! You are on the way!

    1931 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/5/2013 11:54:22 PM
    One meal at a time, one hour at a time. You can be healthy right now by eating one planned meal and having some water and maybe walking for five minutes. That is achieving a healthy NOW... string together enough NOWS and you will feel so much better.
    1931 days ago
    You just have to take it one day at a time and tell yourself that you are worth it!
    1931 days ago
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