2013: Ready... Set... Whoa?
Thursday, January 03, 2013
Yeah, what he said! Happy New Year SPers!!!! Congrats on being able to see another year of life! I'm so thankful I've been blessed with another year to get my health and life together. I never knew getting in shape with a very active seven month old would be so difficult. Nevertheless, I enjoy it and wouldn't have it any other way. I remember when I was carrying her I would say what all I would do after giving birth. I remember saying that I'd be in the gym and that all my foods would change. I remember saying that she wouldn't interfere and I further remember other moms smiling and with a chuckle saying, "ok" as if they didn't believe me. Even now, as I type this, she has managed to belly crawl to me so she can type something for all to read. If she's doing that, one can only imagine how difficult it has been to carve out some time in the schedule to dedicate it to all that I desired to do.
With that being said, I decided to make changes. I said this year (2013) I'll need some accountability partners. I said that I'll buy a machine that will emulsify vegetables and fruit so that I can have my nutrition on the go. I said that I'll attend more classes at the gym such as yoga, pilates and zumba. I said...I said...I said. It's day 3 of 2013 and each of these classes had a session. Did I go? No. I have my accountability partners. Did I check in with them for the new year? No. I received my above-mentioned machine yesterday. Have I tried it out at all? No. Let me go forward. My husband's hours at his job changed to where he is home earlier. Have I taken advantage of that by allowing him to watch the kid while I do something to better my health? No. Have I made every effort possible to do something to better my health? No. NO...no... NO...no...NO! A bunch of nos for a year in which I was designed to be ready. I have everything in place. I said I was ready. I did things to be set. So why now is there a whoa?
I have no excuses yet there is a whoa, a hold placed on me accomplishing all that I set out to do. Well, in me finding an accountability partner, I have someone with whom I speak often about goal setting among other things. It was in today's session that I discovered something. My "whoa(s)" in life are not about the lack of setting myself up for success. It is also not about having a lack of knowledge for success. It's about my fear of what may happen if I don't succeed. Case and point: when I was hospitalized in 2010 and I was surrounded by patients 40 to 50 years my senior, I was fearful that I would not make it that long had I continued on the path I was on. So I made changes...out of fear. It was positive changes. Changes that led to the little one who is tugging on my shirt at this very moment. Nevertheless, when I had the victory, it left me with a 'what now' feeling. I worked hard and planned for the results I had later in 2010 and the big result of a kid in 2012. But now for what do I work? Better health? Better choice of clothes? Better example for my kid and others in life? Better example for future clients? All of these are great reasons yet they are so overwhelming to where the brakes are put on again. Why? Because what if I don't succeed, then what? Where do I from there? Will I still have a clean bill of health? Would stylists make a better choice of clothing for people my size? Would I still be a good example for my kid and others and if I am, of what exactly would I be a good example?
All these thoughts race through my head as I now ponder my desired accomplishments. This time, I think I'll take the advice of my coach: start with the root of the problem and symptoms will go away. Fear is the problem; all else are symptoms of the problem. The only way to conquer fear is to face it head on and how can I do this? By being like NIKE and just do it. Besides, how else am I to know that what I am afraid of (success) is worth the fear? Therefore, by any means necessary, I will stand up to fear of success one hurdle at a time. Whether I win or lose each round will no longer depend on the result but whether or not I attempted it. In the end, that may be the best form of success after all.
Until next time, stay motivated! WE CAN DO IT!!! Happy 2013 everyone!!!