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Just Plain Tired of Starting Over!

Tuesday, January 01, 2013

I am sick of this...and sick of me! Now I know better. I lost 50 lbs when I first joined Spark almost 5 years ago, and here I am with a weight gain for last year. I don't like myself. I have started so many ways to lose weight and it never "takes".

Tired of gaining, tired of looking at my fat self in the mirror, tired of rearranging my many different sizes of clothes in my closet, and tired of letting my friends know I have no will power.

Here's the big problem. I wander in and out of the kichen "after hours". Therein is my biggest problem. Admittedly, I eat more calories during "after hours snack time" than at me al time and also admittedly, i don't ever count those calories. What the hell is wrong with me?

And then there is the thing of not getting enough sleep. I never knew that lack of sleep can sabotage your weight...I have always stayed up late no matter what time I had to get up. Sometimes only getting 4-5 hours of sleep.

So there you have it. Get to bed earlier, and stay out of the kitchen after 8 pm. And if I mess up and go to the kitchen, I commit to counting those calories. It will at least make me aware.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hi Jean...I'm starting again too.
    I'd like to share with you a recent blog I posted.

    " Monday, February 18, 2013

    I found this on a fellow sparkers page....just have to keep it for me to read once in awhile.

    "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming 'WOW, what a ride!'"

    If I can skid in broadside...that means I am going at a pretty good speed when I get there. In order to do that...I need to be healthy.

    HERE I COME........... emoticon "

    Stay strong and be determined Jean, you are worth it.


    1938 days ago
  • SJG1953
    Me too my friend! I have started over yet again myself. I get so frustrated with myself because I keep messing up. I am not giving up though! I have lost 4.5lbs so far on this try. I lost 100 lbs and I've gained back around 50, but I am DETERMINED I am going to take it back off!! YOU GO GIRL!!! With God's help, we CAN do this!!!!!!!!
    1976 days ago
    Just read your blog and Oh my, can I identify with those feelings. Recently I saw on one of those TV shows. (I think that it was Dr Oz) that we should find something about our physical self that we like and focus on that. I could only say that I liked my ears that day. That is sad isn't it? But at least I had a starting point. Now I realize that I like my hair as well. I hope that you can find something that you like about you to start with. It helps on the days that you feel like you hate yourself. Just say to yourself. Well at least I like my (toe nails or whatever) by the way I hate my toenails.
    Francis emoticon
    1986 days ago
    Jean we all need to do that . I am the worlds worst at nibbing and not counting it as calories , will like you try to do better.
    mattie sue
    1988 days ago
    emoticon You've identified all your hurdles. emoticon making your dreams reality in 2013! emoticon
    1988 days ago
    Jean- your words were never so true about so many people before. Starting over is a choice. A great choice that you are able and willing to make- emoticon You can and will reach your weight goals--it's all baby stepsand bunny hops to the end of our roads! We'll get there! We really will!
    1992 days ago
    Jean you sound just like me. Every Monday I start again and by Wed. I am back to old habits. Not now. I am going to do this. I know you can too.

    Hugs Barbara
    1992 days ago
    Jean- I know how you feel. You will make it. I like the pickle idea. emoticon emoticon
    1992 days ago
  • MOM1014
    Well said Jean. Hey you made goal!! I know you can do it again. I've been trying to hit it for 5 years. Your blog says what so many of us think BUT...Add , "I will not beat up on myself". " I will pick myself up, dust myself off and get back in the race"

    You did that blog so very well! You are worth the effort so thanks for your input and onward Christian Soldier!!

    Love 'n hugs,
    Lee emoticon
    1993 days ago
    You have said just how I feel - I am 7 lbs heavier than when I joined Spark, and I intended to lose!.
    Now I too, must start over.............again! But we won't quit starting over; if we do not at least try, we will gain, gain, gain! So we just keep picking ourselves up and trying again. As we used to say KOKO - we will keep on keeping on.
    Remember, we're all in this together!
    Mary Lou
    1993 days ago
    You and I started SP at about the same time and you reached Goal I was so proud of you! I never did...I did lose ten pounds and gained a few pounds back, was a yo-yo...gain, lose. I refuse to give up and so like you have determined to keep trying. You are on the right track Jean, staying out of the kitchen and sleeping well is a good beginning. I am with you all the way! God Bless my friend!!
    1993 days ago
    Jean I know exactly how you feel, I feel the same way but you state it so much better than I can. I have the same problem of snacking in the evening and not getting enough sleep. We can do it. We can make 2013 our year to shine.

    Let's do it!

    1993 days ago
  • MCGS62
    You should "like you" WE "LIKE YOU"

    and your resolve is good !! After hours kitches are a common problem but I know you can beat it!!
    1993 days ago
  • ANDI571
    You aren't starting over, you are just continuing on. It frustrating for sure, but it happens. Forgive yourself, and move into right now. Yesterday is gone. I know it is easier said than done, but you can do it. You have the tools, you just haven't been using them.

    emoticon emoticon
    1994 days ago
  • MARYB73
    Jean, you could not have said it better. Fortunately, God gave us the will to START OVER.
    This is the year to make it last. I am old enough that I know I don't have too many years left in which I can start over.

    1994 days ago
    emoticon Today is the Perfect time to Start Your New Lifestyle FOREVER!!
    You are WORTH It, and I know you will Succeed!!!
    1994 days ago
    One step, one day at a CAN do it!

    If I can be of any help, please let me know.
    1994 days ago
    Jean, I love your blog. So easy to get into those bad habits. I've regained more than I planned (?) over the holidays too. It's now or never for me. You have two excellent suggestions. I have to go back to doing what worked for me before.

    Let's get it right this time! emoticon
    1994 days ago
    Ugggh, those kitchen trips get me in trouble too. Here's what I found that works for me. I have a dill pickle spear when I find myself with the fridge open. It's a tart puckery pickle, only has 8 or 9 calories, with a strong flavor that kills my craving for anything else.
    1994 days ago
    I love love love your post and especially the picture that says....if you are tired of starting over, stop giving up! Such a perfect thing to say! I start over allll the time and I don't "stick" to a plan at all. I think I'm going to print off that saying and your post and attach it to my refrigerator for motivation!!! Best of luck to you in 2013!
    Lucy emoticon
    1994 days ago
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