Whiney Blog Ahead....
Friday, December 28, 2012
Lately I feel like ive been riding the negative train to depression town.
I just can't get motivated. Focusing only on my failures.
I wanted so badly to get fit and look and feel good on my trip to DR. I didn't lose a pound, and my body didnt change. I still had a great time, but I hardly took any pictures and finched every time my friends did because I knew how bad I was going to look. Its made me so depressed about myself.
I know there are people way worse off than I am, and I try so hard not to focus on myself but I cant break this cycle of self loathing.
My mother is smaller than I am now. I am SO proud of her and happy for her finally being where she wants to be and being healthy and happy.
I want to be like that.
I just feel like no matter what I do I am a failure.
I know its just baby steps.
I KNOW i need to do this for me.
I dont know what to do though.