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Program changes are NO excuse to misbehave ~

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Last night, after everyone was in bed, I was in my room watching TV and I got very hungry. I guess it is likely because I had a salad for dinner and wasn't full ~ it happens. But, I don't like being hungry ~ so I decided to make a couple of slices of raisin bread toast with light butter. Yes, this put me 'over' in calories for the day.

I decided to go with 'maintenance' calories, even though I am not certain what amount of calories that is. I did get an approximation on-line but don't know where SP is hiding their calculator. ;) Anyway ~ I did know for certain how much I COULD get away with. So, I ate my toast and felt considerably better.

But, my mind is out to get me, so it wasn't long after that I thought "I've blown it for today so I might as well have some cookies and start fresh tomorrow." I walked into the kitchen, opened the cupboard door and took the cookies down ~ at that moment common sense took over. I said "No" out loud, put the package back and closed the cupboard door. As I went back to my TV program, I realized how close I had come to making a bad mistake. Thank God, I had come to my senses. Who knew what I might have told myself next if I'd eaten the cookies?

This is very NEW behavior for me. In the past, that is exactly how I stayed fat. I would listen to the itty-bitty committee of idiots in my head telling me how I "might as well" do this or that because I had "blown" it already. And, I would be off and running, or rather eating.

Thanks to Spark People and my Spark Friends, I do not have to do that any more. I know a lot more than I did then. I have support and all kinds of tools to work with at SP. Plus, I am NOT a loser ~ and I know that one mistake does not equal failure. Besides, I really didn't do anything wrong. So what if I didn't lose yesterday ~ I didn't gain either. And that is what is important. I, also, fed myself when I was hungry ~ and if I had it to do over, I'd do the same.

So 'changes' in program are NOT an excuse for me to do something that I will be sorry for down the line! emoticon emoticon
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