150,000-199,999 SparkPoints 182,259

day 26

Friday, December 07, 2012

i am struggling
i am trying to do honest logging after all it is the only way to see what i am actually eating and lose weight
but i am so far in denuial it is unbelieveable
maybe i have just been trying for too long maybe the NEED to lose weight is no longer as strong
the urge to exercise is pretty random one day i feel i need to the next i really cant be bothered or i am so tried i dont have the energy to
my mucles have been a lot better and my joint so maybe i can just put is down to listening to my body but tbh i think i put is down to laziness
i would much rather sit on my pc or infront of the tv and eat
that is how i got so fat in the first place
i am not going down that route again i know that but heck i could sit and stuff a whole cake or a whole bag of nuts even tho i know it is not the right thing to do and i know i will be really annoyed at myself if i put on weight again
it is jusst that need is only strong when i know i am standing on the scales and the number is going the wrong way

i cant help but wonder if i have burnt myself out and jst fed up with anything remotly heslthy
but as soon as i stop logging i feel like i am missing something and it doesnt feel right
it has become habit
shame the exercise and eating right hasn't
but then i dont think anyone can eat the right things all the time
everyone needs a bit of something occationally
right enough
exercise..... nothing
sweet stuff... cookie and pie at work lemon merangue after
sleep... great but still tried
feel... pretty ok
had a bad mood swing last night but picked up ok from it this morning

also just found out my mum is going to be away over christmas so i wont get to see her emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I know how you feel. I haven't tracked anything all year, except for exercising for 14 minutes this year...that is pretty bad. Everyone can't be good with the foo all the time as long as they are eating in moderation, but I know I overeat and I am trying to cut back. I have cut out the chips for most part....a work in progress. Same with pop. I was doing well with that until Thanksgiving when family was in for a visit and we did a lot of siteseeing.
    Sorry to hear you mom will be away for Christmas, but you can always celebrate with her at a different time.
    1990 days ago
  • FREEDOM5000
    Well done on blogging for 26 days that shows commitment! The things we truly want in life take us outside of our comfort zone and so there will be easier paths back to our old selves from time to time, that's when you need to spark your effort as much as you can and doubly make sure you complete your positive action! Have you read "spark!"? If you haven't I really reccomend you do, it's motivated me to start, if you have, then try rereading the first chapter or 2 - the power of a streak should not be underestimated! :P

    Good luck with your goals. Most important thing is to remember how far you have come, and to congratulate yourself on being here in the first place.

    Look forward to reading about your progress over the coming weeks. =)
    1991 days ago

    Comment edited on: 12/7/2012 4:19:30 PM
    one step at a ntime. First one is learning to be honest.
    1991 days ago
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