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This is HARD!!!

Wednesday, December 05, 2012

For the last several days, I've been struggling with a shoulder injury that rendered me temporarily unable to workout.

For some reason, that translated into, "I'm injured, so I MUST eat everything I can get my hands on NOW!" and that is what I did for about 3 days. Which, of course, sent me into a fit of depression over not taking better care of myself and a bunch of self-recrimination over throwing all my hard work these past 5+ months down the drain.

I was still drinking my water and I did get out for a couple of nice long bike rides (I don't ride with my shoulder, thank God!).

And most of the food I ate was healthy, even if it was in ridiculous quantities.

But none of that mattered to me. My self-talk and ability to think logically seemed to be injured along with my shoulder. I never knew those things were connected!

Anyway, today was the day that I said "enough is enough". I grabbed my bootstraps and pulled up with as much strength as I could muster. I made myself eat "right" all day and take the stairs at work. I drank extra water. Then, I went to the gym after work and worked my butt off. Man, it was HARD to do that!!! But I stayed motivated by reminding myself of my birthday goal and how close I am to achieving my desired birthday weight of 149 lbs. I can still make it if I work hard and I refuse to let myself down just when I'm so close, so I kept moving.

Then, I thought about all the smaller size clothes that I've been able to wear and how much better I feel about myself when I'm in them.

I also reminded myself that I've been getting rid of all my "fat" clothes as I've been shrinking and I would be darned if I was going to start laying out money to replace them now! Not when I'm just starting to enjoy clothes again.

And I kept going.

And I'm glad I did because, while this is hard, losing weight, being healthy, and looking good again IS what I want. I'm committed to my own well-being and I will NOT sacrifice my body again.

As I left the gym today, I felt tired and sweaty and a bit sore, but I was also proud of myself. And that's a VERY good thing.

It means I'm BACK!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    AS my fitness mentor said to me last time I injured my shoulder - so I guess we focus on lower body workouts till that shoulder feels better --- I was speechless - I thought I had a "pass" until I felt better - now I know better and so do you.... so what you had a break - now you are back with a vengenence....focus on the activities you can do and get on with the rest..... You are back -YAHOO!
    2420 days ago
    emoticon Kicking yourself in the butt the right way and getting back to it. Everyone has slip ups and the thing that really matters is that you get back on board and don't continue on that same demeaning path.
    2420 days ago
    emoticon on getting back on track
    2420 days ago
  • _MOBII_
    Welcome back! I hope your shoulder improves and I know how it is to be injured or not feeling well and thinking that eating anything (and everything in my case) is ok!
    Good job pulling yourself out of that cycle and getting moving again!
    2420 days ago
    Welcome back.. from fighting your temptations.. you have learned a lifelong skill. Self talk to keep yourself on track.. even when things are not 100%. It's something people don't talk about often. emoticon
    2420 days ago
    We all have setbacks. I admire your resiliency.
    2420 days ago
    I'm soo proud of you. Keep it up girl. I have always admired your strength and your determination

    As Dottie always says " nothing to it but to do it"

    Love you more

    2420 days ago
    Woo Hoo! Congratulations! You did awesome. You caught yourself, stopped and got going back in the right direction. That is WONDERFUL. Stand tall and proud today.
    2420 days ago
    So glad to hear that you found your mojo. This is a horrible time of the year with the crazy busyness of everything. Add a shoulder injury and it's no wonder you slipped a little. But, you got right back up again and that is what matters.
    2420 days ago
  • SANDYB223
    You are the best!! We all slip up at times, but you caught yourself....so WAY TO GO GIRL!!!

    2420 days ago
  • no profile photo LOVINSHERRY78
    been there done that, lol. i think we all have. we wouldn't be human if we haven't. i love that you see the bigger picture and you are aware of the situation. way to buckle down and move forward. let the last 3 days be the past b/c we can only change the future! u got this, i just know you do!!!
    p.s. when is your birthday?
    2420 days ago
    Kathy, well now we know you are human like the rest of us. You were pretty bionic and untouchable there for a while. You did great recovering from the slight slip. Just another part of the journey we are all taking.

    I like everyone else have been having a crazy schedule trying to get as much done as possible and I started thinking what if I hurt my foot and I could not do the 5K on saturday, would that throw me? I have been experiencing a little foot pain from a walking injury. So I thought yes it would if I do not plan for it.

    So while putting up lights I was planning what I would do if I got injured to the point I could not exercise like normal. So I made a non walking exercise plan. A little crazy I know but that gave me peace to know how I could handle continuing to lose weight without doing my regular exercise.

    So I totally get your frustration and let down over the shoulder as any of us would also feel and it would have to take a bounce back. But just like you did we would bounce back if we have a contingency plan.

    So I advise all of us to think through that step of what we would do if we had to do things differently. Then it would be just like any emergency practice like a fire drill. People can stay off the panic because they already have a mental plan in place. At least that is my thought, I have not had to experience it yet as you have. Hang in there Tiger and we know you will make it, you are a fighter and fighters never give up, they just find a new way to fight!!

    I believe in you!!
    emoticon emoticon
    2421 days ago

    Comment edited on: 12/6/2012 4:31:54 AM
    I'm sorry you've been struggling for a few days, but I'm so glad you've got your mojo back. I have no doubt you'll meet your birthday goal! I hope that shoulder heals up quickly. You got this!!
    2421 days ago
  • POPSY190
    Any kind of ill health sends me straight to food! I can only admire the strength of your determination - ver, very well done!
    2421 days ago
    BUT, you never went too far off the beaten path, so that's real good! I just love your blogs!!! Take care, go slow with that shoulder and eat healthy!!!
    2421 days ago
    Glad your back-I've been there myself. You did great getting back up :)
    2421 days ago
    Glad to have you back!!!
    Good for you pulling up your boot straps. On keep yourself on course. Your birthday gift is waiting for you.
    2421 days ago
    emoticon you did it! Do you have something you can 'focus' on other than food, when you get to 'feel this need" again? The suggestion to write a note to yourself - listing all the reasons why you want to attain your goal may be a good place to start' emoticon or set a time limit ie 15 minutes of doing something else, before you cave in - emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2421 days ago
    Great job! I'm proud of you for getting back on track! Keep it up!
    2421 days ago
  • 1EMMA2011
    So proud of you!! We all stumble from time to time. The important thing is to get back up as you did as quickly as we can.

    2421 days ago
    I'm proud of you too! Good for you for getting back in the game!

    It IS hard.

    We're going against our grain . . . . . re-programming (or attempting to) years and years and years of all the wrong stuff.

    One time I did something like that, I wrote an extensive note to myself, put a sticky label on it saying "BEFORE I [do this again] READ THIS!" and you know, it worked.

    You're a winner!

    emoticon emoticon

    And I hope your shoulder gets better real soon!
    2421 days ago

    Comment edited on: 12/5/2012 11:26:06 PM
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