Thursday, November 29, 2012
I used to never, ever test my blood sugar in the morning. I didn’t really want to know. I knew it was high. Of course, I had to make due on short supplies. I hadn’t had medical insurance for 3 years. I made due with what I had on hand. That meant either taking 33% of my metformin dose, of holding off on my Lantus (long-acting Insulin) except for a day or two a week. I ran out of Novolog a long time ago (fast acting Insulin). It was expensive without insurance. My parents offered to pay for the refills on all of that stuff. I would have had to gone to the doctor and weighed, had my blood pressure taken which would have been out of whack, blood drawn…all of which was expensive. It wasn’t the money that was expensive. It was the results. I was dumb…boy was I dumb. I knew better.
A couple of years ago, I started experiencing neuropathy pain in my left foot. That’s bad news. Most of the time, diabetics have issues with their left lower limb. They can easily develop ulcers from poor circulation, which get infected due to slow healing time. They spend a lot of time at wound clinics getting wounds debrided and dressed…often times a couple of times a week. I was freaked out to say the least. I blamed it on my shoes. I even convinced myself a little bit. I knew, though, that this was not good. I knew it as beginning….yet I did nothing about it. Again, the chance of hearing bad news like “your diabetes is progressing to a point that you will lose that foot” was not appealing to me. I didn’t want to hear it. So I turned the other cheek, so to speak. I did mention I was dumb, right?
Diabetics should also be checking their feet. The tops of me feet were OK. That was all I could see really because I had this Mini-Cooper around my waist making it difficult to see the bottoms, or reach my toes to check them. Talk about embarrassing. I couldn’t even imagine having to tell someone WHY I lost my foot. I couldn’t see my toes…I couldn’t reach my toes. In all reality, I wouldn’t have to tell them anything. They would see a fat guy and one foot, walking with a cane and know that I made bad decisions. Depression would be my new best friend.
When people talk about the cost of this program, I look back on this feeling and question that statement. People are spending this already on food that is killing them. They spend that much money killing themselves, maybe more, yet to save their own lives, they frown at the cost. It isn’t a cost. The price of Ideal Protein is an investment in yourself, in your family and in your future. It’s a ticket to a better life. It is a ticket to appreciation of self and everything YOU have to offer this world; something that most maybe find difficult being overweight. It literally has freed me from side effects of medication, from fatigue and self-doubt. I see things so much differently, and this is only day 10. I implore anyone reading this and wondering if Ideal Protein is something for you, to stop thinking about the cost and invest something in yourself. I spent a long time thinking I shouldn’t lose weight and just die miserable because that would be my penance for over-indulgence. I have come to realize I am worth it. I am worth much more than I give myself credit for. I didn’t want to miss out on anymore of life because of a pity party. So I invested in myself. I don’t plan on ever looking back.