I am working hard to find inspiration these days...to begin again. This journey has taken me to so many places. And, yet I find a sense of hopelessness creeping in at times. My own struggles with weight and feeling fit and healthy seem pale in comparison to the people I have known and loved who have survived great loss, Cancer, or other tragedies.
And yet, I am working too hard, forgetting to be grateful some days, wishing I could be more, loving my life, but not living it as joyfully as I could, feeling as if I am not giving back in meaningful ways to those in need...yet, ironically also feeling unappreciated at times.
Some days I feel like a whiner for even talking about my own challenges. But then, that is what I tell everyone else to do. I have been so blessed with riches -- love, meaningful work, family, friends, a warm, safe home, healthy food and clean water in abundance. So, what is there to complain about...cause unhappiness?
I feel "heavy." Not just in body weight, but mentally, sometimes spiritually. And then, a bit of magic happens and the Universe gives me a gift. As usual, in the form of verse:
This is what the things can teach us:
patiently to trust our heaviness.
Even a bird has to do that
before he can fly.
~ Rainer Maria Rilke ~
/Book_of_Hours_II_16.html for the full piece.)
I am learning to trust the Universe...but, I have a long way to go.
Blessings and joy to all!