"Torn by the storms in my head...

Monday, November 19, 2012 a victim of fate, born to regret." So goes the song "Torn" by Kamelot (from their new album Silverthorn, which is pure epic awesomeness by the way!!!). Every time I hear those lyrics I feel like they describe me perfectly...I have to keep reminding myself that everything I put myself through, good or bad, is all in my head. I also have to be reminded that my natural tendency is to have a fateful, grim outlook, and that it's up to me to think positive.

Last week was extraordinarily hectic and stressful, I had about 10X more work than usual, and my stomach was feeling a bit weird, which screwed up my meal schedule. I really wanted to just say "damn it all to hell" and do whatever I wanted. And yet, what I wanted every day after work was to drive straight to boot camp and release all the stress by working out. Food-wise I did have a little "encounter" with a couple of doughnuts on Friday night emoticon, but other than that I was able to keep it together. I kept thinking about something one of trainers always asks during class: “How bad do you want it?”…well I want this more that anything else in life right now. I want this new healthy, rationality-driven lifestyle to carry me through tough times. Stress is a part of life, bad days come and go but there’s nothing more worthwhile than staying the course. I (mostly) did not fall back into the self-destructive cycle of emotional eating, and I learned once again that I’m capable of more strength and mindfulness than I give myself credit for.

So all in all, I’d say it was a pretty good week.

PS - ""Torn" just came up on my iPod (on shuffle)!!!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You have more inner strength than you credit yourself with. The mind will tend to play tricks on you and lead to negative thoughts. It can be controlled by belief in yourself and adjusting the way you think about yourself.
    You have already shown that you have inner strength by not totally giving in to eating poorly or over-indulging. You think about the things your trainer has said and leaning towards healther choices.Use this strength to carry you thru.
    2009 days ago
    I'm so proud of you! You handled emotional stress just right! By focusing on what you really wanted from all this, you were able to overcome nearly all of your temptations this week. Determination and knowing what you want is key. If you can handle a week like this so well, you can handle anything. Great job, darling! :)
    2009 days ago
    I'm reading a lot of blogs today with a message of emotional strain. Mine included! I hope the holiday is a fun one for you and that you can keep to your program as much as possible in the midst of all the temptations.
    2010 days ago
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