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MIA, I know.

Monday, November 19, 2012

I can't believe it's been over a month since my last post. Yikes. There's been a lot going on, and I've been all over the place both literally and emotionally.

I spent three out of four weeks on the road in October, in Mumbai, Amsterdam, Ljubljana, and Charlotte. My purse was stolen 18 hours into a 2-week trip, and I spent three days in India in a police station, a US Consulate, and the Indian Foreign Registration Office trying to get a new passport and an exit visa. Suffice it to say I will not be adding India to my list of Favorite Places Ever. (Was my second trip to India, and my second miserable experience. Never again.) The rest was OK, though. I nearly kissed the ground when I landed in Frankfurt, I was so happy to be out of India.

Then I got home and three days later went to Charlotte to visit my friend because I was busy having my stuff stolen while she was celebrating a birthday. I got there late Thursday night, we went out on Friday for a late birthday celebration, and then I cut my trip short and came home on Saturday because of the IMPENDING STORMAGEDDON SANDY. Which, yes, was and continues to be absolutely devastating to New Jersey, but I live in Virginia. And inland Virginia at that. Where everything was perfectly fine except for one crooked tree in my yard. But United called me and said they were getting all the planes out of Dulles and if I want to get home in less than a week I might want to consider taking the Saturday flight, so I did.

Being stuck at home with a combination of PMS and boredom was terrible. I ate an entire package of Oreos in three days. Yikes.

My friend Ali, who has end-stage cancer, is now nearing the end of her 2+-year fight. It's heartbreaking to see her like this, and it's lead to lots of emotional eating. Turns out french fries are not anti-depressant, because they are definitely not working. I've been spending 3-4 days there a week. People keep bringing food, none of which I eat, so at least I'm not totally binging while I'm there. We're trying to stay strong for each other and for her, but we all seem to take turns randomly bursting into tears. I expect that to continue for quite some time. The hospice nurses have said she probably only has days left - I'm expecting Thanksgiving to suck. A lot. Her brother will be here this week, and I think she's waiting on him.

In the meantime, my parents are here for Thanksgiving. They offered to cancel the trip when they heard about Ali, but honestly having my parents here is really good. I may be 34 years old, but when life gets ugly nothing beats a hug from mom. They just got in last night, so we had dinner. However, I'm so busy at work I can't take all week off like I had hoped so I'm working today and tomorrow. At least I'll have Wednesday through Friday with them.

Also in the midst of all this nonsense, I have met a guy I really like. It's only been a month, so I have plenty of time to screw it up, but he's been amazingly patient with my travel and my mood swings. He might just be a keeper.

All that being said, I have managed to keep my weight mostly in the 60s, which I think is damn impressive. I've been exercising when I can, but it's really only been maybe twice a week or so at best. I've been comfort-eating french fries and potato chips and stuff, which is weird because my entire life my stress eating has involved chocolate. And my friend who doesn't even like candy has been eating Kit Kat bars. Somehow we've gone all Freaky Friday on this.

OK, so this is all probably more depressing than it should be, but I wanted to check in here and let you know I am still alive. I'm just having a rough time right now (though there are some bright spots).

I will resurface. I promise.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I, for one, am thankful for Ali, my amazing group of friends, my wonderful parents, this boy being wonderful to me while I go through it all. and you, my SparkFriends.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I'm so sorry to hear about your friend, Ali. I will be thinking of Ali, her family, and you during this time. As tough as it is, you are a great person for standing by her. She needs all the love she can get. I, too, am here if you need a friend. emoticon

    As for the guy, woo hoo! That's great news! I truly hope it works out for you! Also, way to go on working out when you can and staying in the 160s! You're doing great under the circumstances!

    emoticon Happy Thanksgiving! emoticon
    2013 days ago

    Comment edited on: 11/19/2012 2:44:10 PM
    oh boy-- this is quite the update! i am jealous of yr travels but it sounds like you are just where you need to be now, even if it is hard. i hope the holidays are enjoyable and lovely and that you continue to feel supported by yr family and friends and the boy!!!
    2013 days ago
    Wow, so sorry for all the cr@p being thrown your way lately. I will keep you and Ali in my thoughts and prayers. I cannot imagine how difficult that must be, but know that I am here if you ever want to talk.

    Hoooooray for meeting a great guy!! This is some sunshine in the midst of a nasty storm, so I am glad there is something uplifting! :)

    I think you are doing a pretty f-ing amazing job of keeping your health in check among all this other depressing stuff. I'd probably be binging all day every day. So keep up the great work! :)
    2013 days ago
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