A flopped Whole30 is a learning experience
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Well, Mom just asked if she could go take a nap for an hour. Which translates to "quit banging sh*t around, I'm going to sleep." So my chicken thighs are in the oven, the baba ghanous is in the processor waiting to be processed, and I've par-cooked broccoli and green beans for the week. I have italian sausage/beef meatballs waiting to be baked, I cooked some bacon (mmm, bacon) and there is a package of kielbasa and my chicken sausages waiting to be cooked as well. The kielbasa will sit in the fridge until it's go-time, and the chicken sausage will most likely be split up and refrozen for my convenience.
My Whole30 flopped, but despite that, it highlighted a few things in the 2.5 weeks I was on it. Grain-based foods are no bueno for me, sugar is evil, and *something* is causing grievous flatulence in this household (read: me, and I don't know which block of the USDA food pyramid is causing such a delightful experience). I also learned that my desire to be thin really does outweigh my desire to eat less healthy things like cereal, bread, and coffee drinks, although cheese on occasion makes life much more beautiful and chocolate ice cream is a required nutritional supplement when TOM rolls around. Not the least of these highlights is the fact that
Yep. I have this inexplicable ability to eat when I am not hungry. I am so conditioned by years of "never let yourself get hungry" diets and "you have to eat every 2 hours or you'll enter starvation mode and instantly gain 50 pounds" diets to eat at the veriest twinge of sensation in my stomach, or eat at times I'm scheduled to. Boredom eating, just noshing when I have nothing else to do with my hands, comes from my childhood. Very ingrained habit. This all goes hand in hand with eating until I'm full instead of eating until I am no longer hungry... two very different things. In fact, the only way to stop myself from eating when my brain says so instead of when the rest of me says so is to not have food at hand. I talked to MICHERU earlier today and she mentioned that when she eats until she is full, "[she feels] all gross and disgusting." So do I, but by then it's too late.
So I've determined that before a Whole30 will ever be successful for me again, I have to nip this problem. I need to spend a month reconditioning myself to eat ONLY when I'm hungry... like, stomach actively growling hungry... not just because there is food or because I have nothing better to do. This will also make a Whole30 cheaper since I won't be stuffing my face except when I absolutely need to.
So this shall be a 21-Day mindful eating challenge. I will strive to wait until my hunger bar reaches the red zone to eat food, and I will stop chewing when I am not hungry anymore instead of when I am full. I will learn how to portion my food to my satisfaction, and how to cook for the week consistently.
I'm planning to stick to paleo food while I'm at it, because this makes my skin clear and defeats any bloating I might otherwise have, and I'm trying to minimize my carbs to keep the crash headaches at bay. I'd like to add consistent exercise, but we'll see how that goes. Between my thesis prospectus and my papers and midterms, I have a lot of catching up to do there. Plus I'm sick now (earned two antibiotic shots in the backside today), and that never bodes well for exercise.
Time to put the meatballs in and maybe have some chicken. If I'm hungry when it cools enough to handle. If.